Thursday, December 11, 2008

burried finally

i have had very enlightening days so far. one of it being that what i actually want. for that i had to bury my past in such debris that it should'nt come back to haunt me. i have decided in my mind to do it finally. it is relieving. i have found a friend back. life is looking good. so no more depressive love poetries. pheonix rises from the ashes.

Saturday, December 6, 2008

baby, i love you

I know.
I so know.
That you have burnt away
All my memories.
Listen
To me
For a second

That baby I love you.
Would always love you.
Love you in my dreams.
Baby,
Call me again…
Please.

Shout,
My desperation is shouting
At you.
Bleeds. My heart is bleeding
For your one touch.
What am I suppose
To tell
To my soul
That is screaming

That baby I love you.
Would always love you.
Love you in my dreams.
Baby,
Call me again…
Please.

Shala la la la
Sha la la la…
Sitting alone in this corner,
I just want to know
What did I do?
I just want to know…
Are you blind?
To see the teary eyes
Which shouts

That baby I love you.
Would always love you.
Love you in my dreams.
Baby,
Call me again…
Please

No. I am not gonna beg you.
No. I am neither waiting for you.
I just want you to listen to me…
Foe the one last time…

That baby
I love you.
Would always
Love you.
Love you in my dreams.
Baby.
I love you.

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

enough is enough

its been now over a week to the unfortunate day of any Indian life. a lot of things have happened. politicians have resigned made comments, and what not. every one is angry. every one has had enough. for how long will we live like this. but the problem is. have these politicians ever listened to us. have they actually ever cared, what a common man goes through. i wish if we could round these inhuman creatures and end them up. barbaric? i dint think so. its just. have these men in black, the soldiers come into this profession just to die. i dont think so. we dont need a better set of politicians we need to revamp the constitution. we need the politician to know that they are bloody responsible to all this. that we need to be asked, our views every thing. what great work have they done to get such a beefed up security.
they just can see one thing a chair. that is just what they want. power can make a man blind. but blindness to such extent is not welcomed. we, the people have been taken for granted. people are on the streets, asking one thing- what is our fault. have we now, when go to a restaurant, or mall, airport railway station, go with a feeling that we might not come back?
if the terrorist wanted to instill fear in us, listen one thing. U HAVE FAILED. we are strong. we will never divide. we are Indians. we are human and humanity is the most enriching religion.
i am not a girl. i am not even a Hindu. i am an Indian. that is my identity. and i am proud of it.
its time. the days of gandhigiri will not work with these inhuman terrorist. if u eliminate one, we would eliminate 5. its unfortunate that in the name of religion what all these young people are made to do. films like khuda ke liye have shown how young minds are brain washed.
its about time to change. to change ourselves. dont even need to vote, its like choosing between lunatics. would be like to be governed by lunatics? i dont think so.
it time to rise.
its time to say- ENOUGH IS ENOUGH.....

i am i kid after all

I always dreamt of quite streets.
A peaceful sky,
With birds fluttering
All around
I dreamt of walking
Carelessly
With always affection
In a strangers eye.

I hoped to not know
What fear means.
I prayed never to see
Death through a third eye.

I am young
I am feeble.
I am a kid after all
But I am strong
No masked fellow
Would deprive this honour
From me.

You could come a million times.
Rob away my smile
But you could not rob away
From me
my will.
My freedom.
My fight towards unifying
My countrymen.

You might come
Thinking to divide us.
People like you are demons
In a human disguise.
Humans don’t do things
Which you do.

Humans don’t kill
In the name of god.
No god can be happy
With you eliminating
His own very creations.

When will you realize.
When will we
Open our very own eyes.
How long will we question
The men in white?
Or be happy with the green ?
Its time to stop questioning
Its time to rise.
Its time to rise against this
Masked tides.

How many more
Kids like me
Loose their smiles?
Or themselves
before they could even learn
How to write.

Is peace just a mere
word?
Will I see more of death?
Will I have to always scrub the red blood?
Is this the way we all
Have to tread.

When would this end?
The loss cant be repaired.
How many more of Mumbai.
Delhi, jaipur…
Would I have to see?

I always dreamt of quite streets.
A peaceful sky,
With birds fluttering
All around
I dreamt of walking
Carelessly
With always affection
In a strangers eye.

I hoped to not know
What fear means.
I prayed never to see
Death through a third eye.

I am young
I am feeble.
I am a kid after all
But I am strong
No masked fellow
Would deprive this honour
From me.

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

mumbai blasts

i am in extreme pain and shock right now while i am writting this. the terrorists attacked mumbai yet again killing almost 100 people. i got to know about it today morning. my family as well as a frnd reside there. but my concern was not them as i got to know early that they are all alright. i am in pain since these 100 people are died and i dont know how many more. till whem will this go. youth are now terrorist? how can they sleep peacefully after killing so many people.

10:30 AM: The number of policemen killed has gone up to 16. Prime Minister Manmohan Singh [Images] will address the nation after 7 PM after the Cabinet meeting. The Maharashtra state Cabinet will meet at 2 PM.

09:30 AM: Terrorist out in the open! A terrorist holed up inside Nariman House jumps to the adjacent building. Meanwhile, an emergency Cabinet meeting has been called at 1100 hours.

09:27 AM: IB has arrested a Lashkar-e-Tayiba terrorist of Pakistani origin from Mumbai. The e-mail sent after terror attacks has been traced to Russia [Images]. Authorities say the mail was sent by Lashkar operatives. They also believe that the Lashkar terrorists came directly from Karachi to Mumbai.

09:30 AM: Firing has been heard near Nariman House in Colaba. Police have cordoned off the area amid reports that terrorists are holed up in the building.

09:09 AM: Curfew has been clamped in Colaba after firing intensified in the Taj hotel. Police are using smoke cannisters to disable terrorists' vision. Meanwhile, Hostages are being evacuated from the Taj hotel even as gunbattle rages. A journalist has been injured in the firing. All international flights from Mumbai have been cancelled.

08:55 AM: Agencies have reported that terrorists are holed up inside the Cama Hospital. Commandoes have started firing at terrorists.

08:05 AM: Fresh firing erupted early on Thursday in Taj hotel as commandos moved in to flush out terrorists holding some foreigners hostage.

Sharp shooters of army, NSG and other security forces moved into Mumbai's landmark hotel. Police believe that the number of holed out terrorists could be three or four.

Another luxury hotel Trident (formerly Oberoi) was under siege with some terrorists holding some foreigners hostage.

07:50 AM: More grim news is coming in from Taj Hotel, where several staff members have been feared killed in the terrorist attack.

Over 100 guests are still stuck inside the hotel, where two terrorists are reportedly holed up.

At Nariman House in Colaba, onlookers informed that the police exchanged fire about an hour ago.

The place looked like a riot-hit site, swarming with police officials and military trucks. Most people have been holed up here since an explosion shook the area at 10.30 pm.

The explosion occurred when the terrorists lobbed hand grenades at the local petrol pump. The blast was followed by a gunfight between police forces and the terrorists.


Taj burns

06:20 AM: The hostage crisis continued at Taj Hotel in the wee hours of Thursday as Army commandos moved in to flush out the terrorists.

Meanwhile, Maharashtra Chief Minister Vilasrao Deshmukh assured that there was no hostage situation at Cama Hospital in South Mumbai.

An Army commando was reportedly injured in the shoot-out. An explosion was also reported in the lobby of the Taj Hotel


04: 23 AM: Vaihayasi Pande-Daniel reports that the fire that engulfed the old wing of the Taj Mahal [Images] Hotel in Mumbai has been put out. Though the major conflagration has been contained, flames continue to flicker, occasionally leaping into life, at the corner of the heritage wing.

Police and fire brigade personnel have placed ladders against the side of the building, and are bringing hotel guests out through that means. Some foreigners who had been evacuated were being ferried to a nearby hospital for first aid, while others are being taken by bus to alternate accommodations. Officials here estimate that most of the guests inside the hotel have been evacuated.

Video 2

Commandos of the Indian navy meanwhile have staked out vantage points covering all exit points, while others of their number prowl around the perimeter of the hotel.

A group of Taj employees stood clustered on the pavement opposite the hotel, staring at the hotel through tear-filled eyes. They had been told to leave, they said � but clearly, they could not bring themselves to walk away from a hotel that, to them and to most Mumbaikars, is shared heritage than mere hotel.

Elsewhere, an attractive young woman attempted to restore some semblance of order to her silver-zari sari. She was drenched, and still disoriented from her experiences of the night.

"We were partying, and suddenly there was firing all over," the woman, who had just been evacuated by ladder from a window some 30 feet up, recalled. "I'd read about such things in the paper, and routinely turned the page� but when it happens to you, when you experience it�"

03: 57 AM: Though the firefight at the Oberoi is still far from finished, the takeover of the operation by units of the Indian Army [Images] appears to have taken the South Mumbai hotel off the 'critical' list.

Vaihayasi Pande-Daniel reports for Rediff that most of the one dozen fire trucks that had been stationed around the Oberoi have been dispatched to the Taj Mahal Hotel, where a blazing fire threatens to devastate the old wing of the iconic hotel.
Daniel cites police sources as saying the army commandoes are doing a systematic sweep of the hotel, lobbing grenades ahead of them to take out hidden dangers before securing each successive wing of the hotel.

The constant bang of grenades from within the hotel continues to alarm the crowds gathered outside the hotel, and kept at a distance by police. Not all of them have come to gape, however. Vadhavan, a businessman from New Delhi [Images], sits in rumpled attire on the parapet of Marine Drive, trying to stay awake.

He had arrived in Mumbai this evening at the head of a 13-member business delegation. He was in the act of checking into the Oberoi when the firing began. "I think the shooting started at the Oberoi," says Vadhavan. "They ushered us all out through a side entrance and told us to leave. I got separated from the rest of my group; I think they are waiting on the other side of the hotel."

The flushing out operation is far from finished; Vadhavan's wait threatens to extend through what remains of this night.



3:42 AM: At the Taj Hotel, where a joint operation involving the Mumbai police, the Central Reserve Police Force and a commando group from the Navy is engaged in flushing out terrorists within the premises, PTI reports that almost all the guests have been brought out to safety at the time of writing this.

The situation continues to remain dangerous, however, with an indeterminate number of terrorists within the hotel, two of whom are believed to be holding a group of tourists hostage on an upper floor.

Meanwhile, the fire that erupted in the old wing of the historic hotel has spread alarmingly. The fire now burns bright across at least two mid-level floors of the old wing, and thick clouds of black smoke spew from the signature minaret that crowns the hotel's roof.

03: 06 AM: A little over four hours since gunshots first erupted at the CST railway terminal, and coordinated terrorist attacks spread to various parts of South Bombay, the situation remains fluid.

At the Taj Mahal Hotel, a contingent of Navy commandos has joined the police and Central Reserve Police Force personnel attempting to enter the hotel and flush out the terrorists. From within the hotel, word is that occasional explosions, and sporadic gunfire, continue at the time of writing this.

At the Oberoi Hotel, the army has taken over the operation and entered the hotel; it is now reportedly engaged in flushing out the terrorists hiding within.

At the Cama Hospital, a specialty medical center for women and children, official sources say terrorists are holed up on the fourth floor and have been firing from that vantage point. Police have surrounded the hospital and are engaging the terrorists in an ongoing gun battle.

02:50 AM: Communist Party of India-Marxist leader and Member of Parliament N N Krishnadas, who is staying at the Taj Mahal Hotel, reports that as late as 2:10 AM, explosions could be heard from within the premises.

Krishnadas told CNN that he is holed up in a room, and outside of the noise of explosions and gunfire has no real idea what is happening within the premises.

Meanwhile, the fire that broke out in one of the hotel's middle floors has been spreading upwards, adding a fresh hazard both to the police and CRPF personnel engaged in the anti-terrorist operation and to the guests within the hotel.

Even as police sources upped the toll in today's terrorist strikes in Mumbai at 80 and counting, police continue to lay siege to the Taj Mahal Hotel, where two terrorists are believed to be holding at least 15 guests hostage on one of the upper floors of the hotel.

The police are at this point in time unsure whether the two hostage takers are the only terrorists within the hotel.
Meanwhile, the Indian Army has moved into the Oberoi and the Trident, the two other South Mumbai hotels targeted in today's terrorist strikes.

A battalion of the Indian army entered the Oberoi and began an operation against the terrorists holed up inside. The army was called in after the police took several casualties, including the deaths of some senior officers.

With the army now in charge of this phase of the operation � the first time the Indian army is operating in the city since the 1992 riots � the police has fallen back and is focusing on cordoning off the area.

Vaihayasi Pande-Daniel, reporting for Rediff.com from outside the Oberoi Hotel, reports that with the cordon being drawn tight, people waiting outside are in a state of panic, and desperately searching for information. A group of senior bankers from Hyderabad are among those inside the hotel to attend a conference; their Mumbai-based colleagues are outside, awaiting word of their fate.

02: 25 AM: Mumbai's Anti-Terrorist Squad chief Hemant Karkare died of bullet wounds in the ongoing battle against armed terrorists that is raging across several parts of South Mumbai.

Vijay Salaskar, an officer attached to the Mumbai police who has been famed as an 'encounter specialist', was seriously injured in the ongoing gun battle and has been rushed to hospital. In all, seven Mumbai policemen are believed killed thus far.

Meanwhile, Railway Police Chief Ashok Sharma told Rediff.com that at least 40 people were killed inside Mumbai's nodal Chatrapathi Sivaji Terminus. "The attack started around 9.35 pm," Sharma said. "Two terrorists were inside. We can confirm at least 40 people killed."

It is yet unclear whether the terrorists are still on-site, have left, or been killed. Sharma said there had been no firing from within the terminus for the last two hours. "Despite this, we are not allowing people to go into the station as we are worried that the terrorists might have planted bombs or left live grenades in the station," he said.

Sharma said the official belief is that the two terrorists had sneaked out of the station in the confusion following the original assault.

Sudhir Dalvi, a sub-inspector attached to the Mumbai cell of the Anti-Terrorist Squad, told Sheela Bhatt for Rediff.com that his boss, ATS chief Hemant Karkare, and senior police officers Vijay Salaskar and Additional Commissioner of Police Ashok Kamte, were killed in an incident outside Mumbai's Cama Hospital.

"Our chief Karkare, my senior officer Salaskar and ACP Kamte died while engaging terrorists outside the Cama hospital," a sobbing Dalvi told Rediff.com. "All of a sudden, terrorists threw grenades at Karkare leading to chaos. We are unable to confirm whether they fell to terrorist fire or were killed by the grenades."

Meanwhile, the army has moved into the Trident Hotel, the third five-star hotel in the South Mumbai region that had been targeted in tonight's coordinated terrorist strikes.



pray for the departed souls.....and lets pledge to be united at this difficult time. its not about killing mumbaikars. its about india



02:10 AM: It is now believed that 15 people, at least seven of them foreigners, have been taken hostage by two terrorists and are being held on the roof of the Taj Mahal Hotel.

Rakesh Patel, a London-based businessman who managed to escape, told NDTV that the two terrorists, estimated to be in their early 20s, came to a restaurant on the ground floor of the Taj, rounded up the hostages and took them to the 18th floor. Patel, who was one among them, managed at that point to escape.

Patel said the terrorists asked if any of the hostages were carrying American or British passports, and said he got the clear impression that they wanted foreigners.

01:50 AM: Krishnakumar reports from the Juhu region that a bomb went off in a taxi that was speeding along the Western Express Highway from Vile Parle towards Andheri, killing two people and injuring two others.

"The taxi exploded and went up in flames as it sped past the traffic island under the flyover at the domestic airport," an eyewitness said on phone. "The vehicle, which was up in flames soon after it crossed the traffic signal, was on the left
side. A bystander and a person in the taxi were killed.

Reports indicate that this was perhaps the night's highest-intensity blast. Krishnakumar reports that the taxi's doors were found a distance of 50 meters or more away, and body parts of the victims had been thrown even further.

01:43 AM: At least two suspected terroristswere shot dead minutes earlier at the corner of Mumbai's Chowpatty. Rediff's Vaihayasi Pande-Daniel, who is on the site, reports that the area has been cordoned off and is swarming with police officers; the Skoda is under guard and a cellphone, a jacket, and items of footwear are strewn around the vehicle.

Meanwhile at the Taj Mahal Hotel, the standoff between police, who have surrounded the hotel, and terrorists who are holed up inside, continues.

A short while ago, power went off in parts of the hotel, adding to the sense of panic and fear. Well known food critic Sabina Sahgal Saikia, who is inside the hotel, told NDTV on phone just now that the guests are terrified, and unaware of just what is happening around them. It is unclear at this point in time whether the power has been turned off by the police as they battle the terrorists.

01:27 AM: Rediff's Vaihayasi Pande Daniel calls in from the Marine Drive region to report that the approaches to the South Mumbai area have been shut down, and that sounds of firing are audible as far away as Mumbai's famed Queen's Necklace stretch, though the source of the firing is unclear.

Meanwhile, a foreign national who managed to escape from the Taj Mahal Hotel, where a state of seige currently exists, told NDTV that armed and masked gunmen were wandering around inside the hotel, looking for people with American or British passports.

The eyewitness account appears to confirm the growing belief among law enforcement circles that this latest attack is aimed directly at foreign nationals -- hence the choice of star hotels as prime targets. They further theorize that automatic weapons are being used rather than bombs in order to orchestrate such targeted mayhem.

Meanwhile, the real dangers of the situation are being exaggerated by a proliferation of rumors. One such that has been aired on a few channels including CNN suggested that firing was taking place at the JW Marriott, another five star hotel in the Juhu region of suburban Mumbai. A source in the hotel however confirmed to Rediff just now that there was no alarm at the hotel, and no incident of any kind had taken place.

12:44 AM: A gun battle is ongoing in the Taj Hotel in Colaba. Within the last ten minutes, a guest at the hotel got word out to CNN via email that a grenade had exploded within the hotel premises just then.

Additional Commissioner of Police AN Roy and other officials confirmed that some armed terrorists are holed up in the iconic hotel.

Police officials said they have no information of a hostage situation; they say guests have been sequestered in safe areas of the hotel, and the police are now engaged in flushing out the terrorists from their hiding place.

Sunday, November 23, 2008

frosty december night

I am alone in our room,
Which is full of
Your memories.
The crumbled bed.
The unpolished shoe.
Even the half wrapped gift,
You bought for me.
Nobody to wrap it again for me
As you are gone.

It was the frosty December night,
That I lost you.
It was the night that I hate the most.
Why did you have to pick me up?
It was the frosty December night,
That I lost you.

You are still near to me
Yet so far.
I can still smell your existence
But can’t feel your glance.
Three winters back
When I met you.
Three moon back,
When you were gone.

My life has no meaning without you.
My eyes won’t see another face.
No one will ever come again
So near to me.
It was always just you.
It will always be…
Just you.

I look at the dried roses,
Which filled up the room.
And I walk to open the present you,
bought.
It was a stone.
A sparkly one.
You were going to propose.
(I shake.
The tears jerk away after three days.)

It was the frosty December night,
That I lost you.
It was the night that I hate the most.
Why did you have to pick me up?
It was the frosty December night,
That I lost you.
I love you…

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

you are mine

Resting down with you
On the green emeralds
With daisy’s all around us
Reliving the time when you were gone
It was then my love got born.
Your touch, which I missed
You eclipsed it with your kiss.
Wiping the tears which escaped
My eyes
…You are mine…

I waited for this moment
In every dream I saw.
Dancing to the lullaby tune
In an enchanted shore.
Your disappearance was like
A night which is not starry.
You absence
My repentance
Came and go…
Like friends and foe

People told me not to cry
But I decided to fight
My fate
Till it dried.
The empty cages of my heart,
Craved for you
No matter what I do
It always echoed your name.
And it was not lame,
I didn’t know who to blame.

One sultry evening
When the sun was resting in
You came into my arms
Like a honeyed nectar.
To feel complete
Loneliness depletes.
Nothing changed
And I remained
In your strong frame.

Resting down with you
On the green emeralds
With daisy’s all around us
Reliving the time when you were gone
It was then my love got born.
Your touch, which I missed
You eclipsed it with your kiss.
Wiping the tears which escaped
My eyes
…You are mine…

Monday, November 10, 2008

my romeo

Sitting in the green meadows
Thinking about the dreams
That comes and goes
I was Juliet draped in pink
And you were….
My Romeo……

Hey, hello…listen to me
Hey, hello…please see me…
I want to be the one
With whom you could love
Hey, hello my Romeo…

In between the allies
You would come
But not see me…
I would always try
To stand on your side.
But you would always pass by


Hey, hello…listen to me
Hey, hello…please see me…
I want to be the one
With whom you could love
Hey, hello my Romeo…

With a determined will
I decide to tell you
That I want to be your Juliet.
But…
I see you with someone else…
You were someone else’s Romeo

Hey, hello…listen to me
Hey, hello…please see me…
I want to be the one
With whom you could love
Hey, hello my Romeo…

Sitting in the green meadows
Thinking about the dreams
That comes and goes
I was Juliet draped in pink
And you were….
My Romeo……

i'll miss you dada


It has been quite an eventful week...but i would always remember it as it was im this week that my saurabh went away....i have fond memories of him. it was in 1999 that i first saw him...he was playing at lords and was smashing for cricket. not only did i fell for this Bengali but also the game which has kept me engrossed. gangu as i love to call him is someone for whom i become significantly emotional. I've cheered when he would give some memorable knock and cry when he wont. my addiction towards this game is too much and it is because of him.
when he became the captain for the first time, it was a match against Australia..and we won....
but it was during his bad days that i came in complete support of him. fought with friends because of him and well with my father as well....my love for this fellow was purely because of the magnitude of the game. people talk about MSD's sixes but when saurabh used to hit, it would be out of the stadium....aah...those days...
when my sis called me and told me his plans for retirement...i could not speak. i was shocked. i always wanted to see him play from a stadium...unfortunate it is that it would not happen.....
but i will always remember this fearless man, his never say die attitude, the way he used to captain.....that time when we won the natwest series...the shirt one.....or that emotional pepsi add.......
i cannot write how much i would miss him....dada.....i'll miss you too much

taylor swifts....song

"Teardrops On My Guitar"- taylor swift

Drew looks at me, I fake a smile so he won't see
That I want and I'm needing everything that we should be
I'll bet she's beautiful, that girl he talks about
And she's got everything that I have to live without

Drew talks to me, I laugh cause it's just so funny
That I can't even see anyone when he's with me
He says he's so in love, he's finally got it right,
I wonder if he knows he's all I think about at night

[Chorus:]

He's the reason for the teardrops on my guitar
The only thing that keeps me wishing on a wishing star
He's the song in the car I keep singing, don't know why I do

Drew walks by me, can he tell that I can't breathe?
And there he goes, so perfectly,
The kind of flawless I wish I could be
She'd better hold him tight, give him all her love
Look in those beautiful eyes and know she's lucky cause

[Repeat Chorus]

So I drive home alone, as I turn out the light
I'll put his picture down and maybe
Get some sleep tonight

He's the reason for the teardrops on my guitar
The only one who's got enough of me to break my heart
He's the song in the car I keep singing, don't know why I do
He's the time taken up, but there's never enough
And he's all that I need to fall into..

Drew looks at me, I fake a smile so he won't see.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

the song is so perfect. every word has a deep meaning in it

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

happy birthday to me

yesterday i turned a year old.....and i really had a nice birthday.....some unexpected ppl remembered my birthday and it was just so sweet of him to remember it....then my lovely frnd ohe buki called.....her calls are always so special......i went, as always to a sai mandir and then went to a guy so that he could disinfect my lappy....moron was asking a hefty price so i just ran away from the shop.....lol...later i went on a promised bike ride and then to mc'd favourite thing on earth.....my frnds threw a surprise cake cutting ceremony.....
on 19Th planning for a big Chinese party....and a speciality would be Singaporean noodles for ohe buki..........

Monday, October 13, 2008

boys are stupid

Meredith: You should take something.
Cristina: Drugs are for babies.
Izzie: I hate Alex.
Cristina: And the non sequitur award goes to...
Izzie: I’m sorry, but I hate Alex.
Meredith: I broke up with Derek.
Cristina: Burke wants to have a relationship.
Izzie: Boys are stupid.
Cristina: Yep.


Boys are stupid--- a fact people .It’s something guy’s need to accept. Well they are stupid. They don’t understand hints; they sometimes get mean when you try to be very caring….

The word ‘chipku’ comes out… and they say wrong things at the wrong time.

They are not even sensitive…well sometimes they are but most of the times they…you put words in their mouth actually. Morons.

You become a caring friend they would question that,

You give them space they question that as well…

In a relationship you ask for a break for a little while and they are on your nerves…

You say sorry and they behave like… an ass…

You smile as a friend they ask you out

You refuse and they go on bitching about you…

Sometimes stupidity is so much that they can’t see the difference between something abstract and something real. How difficult is it to see that.
How difficult is to accept your faults…
How difficult is to accept an apology and mend things….but no they won’t. That when the whole male ego crap shoots out… idiots… as if we don’t have it. So when we start showing it we are termed as girls having some attitude.

Not all guys are stupid. Exceptions are there. Although I haven’t met any till now who haven’t shown the boyish stupidity…

Brothers:: well they are stupid as well…they irritate the hell out of you…they never stop irritating you… and man if you scream at them, then you become my not so favorites sis…and baba rakhi ke din…kya attitude mae rehte hai…non sense.
Major guys have the commitment issues. They run away the time you whisper marriage. Live in is what they desire. Are we living in US or something?

The formula to identify this syndrome:


Don’t say right things at the right time + lethargic
---------------------------------------------------------- = stupidity
Ego+ rash mind+ never take what ‘we’ say



Hence proved

Saturday, October 11, 2008

lethargiccccccccccccc

winters have crert in and as all my near dear and loved onse knows.......its time for hibernation.....so now i'd be sleeping all the time and stop thinking all the crap.....i have'nt started studying yet....3rd year is turning out to ne hell........my b'day in 2 day and i hope i aint lethargic on that day.....and confession i have lefted other imposed ban on non veg after two years...had chilen tikka...it did hurt a bit inntionally, but y to bother.past has to b locked forcefully as it does effect your present....latter the taste went on well...but i did feel guilty abt it...for just a min.....2 years idioticallyi tried and well nothing..........this is for ohe buke....im expecting a call from singpore on 13th babe.........kidding

Tuesday, October 7, 2008

pick me. choose me . love me.

Meredith: I lied. I'm not...out...of this relationship. I'm in. I'm so in, it's humiliating, because here I am, begging--
Derek: Mere--
Meredith: Just...shut up. You say Meredith and I yell, remember?
Derek: Yeah.
Meredith: OK, Here it is. Your choice, it's simple. Her or me. And I'm sure she's really great. But Derek...I love you. In a really, really big...pretend to like your taste in music... let you eat the last piece of cheesecake... hold a radio over my head outside your bedroom window... unfortunate way that makes me hate you...love you. So pick me. Choose me. Love me.

So funny question…does love really makes us beg? Hmm what would I do? Funny question again….self respect is so important for majority of people actually; I am not an exception to it at all. I can never do or act something which could be against my self respect…but love makes you do stupid stuff…
Now dats a fact that every one knows ;-)
So coming back, possibilities of saying stuff, what Meredith says to Derek, in my case….
Maybe…
It’s very hypothetical actually what if there is someone whom I love a lot, so much that I feel he is the one. The one…I guess I would be chanting the same lines… no matter what happens; no matter if he tells me to get lost…but it would be like the one last chance being honest to him, one last chance to let out all your desperation…last chance to tell ‘I know there will or is a women in your life but no one can love you the way I have.’
Desperate?
Love is desperate…
And what if the line works and the guy says ‘man I love you too’… that’s a great day for everyone…lol

Meredith: [to Derek, who is standing behind her] I miss you. [Derek moves closer and sniffs her hair.]
Derek: I can't.

Friday, October 3, 2008

greys, moments, firsts and love

Meredith: Hey.
Derek: Hey. You almost died today.
Meredith: Yeah, I almost died today. [Derek is at a loss for words and starts heading to the door] I can't, I can't remember our last kiss. All I could think about was I'm going to die today and I can't remember our last kiss. Which, is pathetic but the last time we were together and happy, I... want to be able to remember that, and I can't. I can't remember.
Derek: I'm glad you didn't die today. [Starts to leave but stops] It was a Thursday morning, you were wearing that ratty little 'Dartmouth' T-shirt you look so good in, the one with the hole at the back of the neck. You'd just washed you hair and you smelled like some kind of...flower. I was running late for surgery, you said you were going to see me later, and you lean to me, put you hand on my chest and you kissed me. Soft. It was quick. Kind of like a habit. You know, like we'd do it everyday for the rest of our lives. And you went back to reading the newspaper and I went to work. That was the last time we kissed. [Derek starts to leave]
Meredith: Lavender. My hair smelled like lavender...from my conditioner.
Derek: Lavender. Huh. [Smiles then leaves]

Meredith: Just leave me alone.
Derek: I just want to make sure you're alright.
Meredith: No! I'm not alright? Okay? Are you satisfied? I'm not alright. Because you have a wife, and you call me a whore, and our dog died, and now you're looking at me. Stop looking at me.
Derek: I am not looking at you. I am not looking at you.
Meredith: You are looking at me. And you watch me. And Finn has plans. And I like Finn. He's perfect for me, and I'm really trying here to be happy, and I can't breathe. I can't breathe with you looking at me like that so just stop!
Derek: Do you think I want to look at you? That I wouldn't rather be looking at my wife? I'm married. I have responsibilities. She, she doesn't drive me crazy. She doesn't make it impossible for me to feel normal. She doesn't make me sick to my stomach thinking about my veterinarian touching her with his hands. Man, I would give anything not to be looking at you.


There are certain moments in your life that defines you. Certain moments you wish to remember the rest of your life, even if they were full of pain. The above lines kind of defines so much…it says so much…it is very easy to fall for someone, equally difficult to totally tailor him away from your life… you lie to yourself every day every night cause it doesn’t hurt you, but when the truth dawns on you it is suffocating. You tend not do so many things, you tend to tell every one around you that you are aright. But the truth is you are not alright. You are desperate to be….but you are not…
These moments are stitched to you; they are inseparable from your soul, from your mind. These moments define you. But, what about the painful moments? Moments which bring tear to your eyes, which makes you wish they never had become moments? What about them? How can one escape those memories which you wish to fade but they don’t?
When you are about to die, you would perhaps just remember one of the series of moments, it troubles me which one it would be…happy ones or sad?
Well you would say too early to think all this, but life is unexpected. You don’t know what will happen to you the next second. We aren’t any sage. We are normal beings who require affection and care. We always hope for someone to come in our lives. Someone…so many characteristics to it. He should be tall, fair, smart, an intellect, and a gentleman. But above all this superficial stuff, we crave for warmth, a touch of love. Difficult to have it all actually. Moments with your someone, is always full of memories, some sweet, some romantic some ugly and some so teary…that you wish it never happened.
Writing scrapbook always is fun, and there is always a spot which says define love…love for some is all the filmy stuff. For some it is unsaid and undefined. Then there are some for whom its always about money but for few its an enchanting feeling; feeling like no other. The kind of relationship Meredith and Derek share in the US sitcom Grey’s Anatomy is what love means to me. No matter how far you stretch away, one can never get out of it. Love surely happens n number of times, but there is one soul mate, one true love. Lucky individual happen to spend their life with them few don’t. And it is surely an agonizing time.
So coming back to the original stuff…moments…which ones are precious? Happy ones or sad? With family or with the loved one? Again too early, perhaps you would never really know. The truth would dawn on you when one is just about to say good bye to this world…till then it would be a mystery…
It was very fascinating to me while growing up that why are the first things so special? Like the first time you started to walk (our moms are the only people who could tell us that), the first time you said ‘ma’, first day to school, first crush, date, boyfriend, kiss. Love etc. it’s because we would not know the feeling surrounding it. It’s like an alien surrounding, which one has never entered. And the feeling upon trespassing is like no other. But when it happens the next time you already know how it feels. These firsts also are some precious moments.
What about those days which you wish never arrived, people you wish never came in your life…tricky. Now you can’t change that fact, so the solution is to accept it. But, then it’s difficult to accept it. As difficult to accept that you are wrong. Its nice to realize your wrongs early so that you could fix them up, but most of the time the realisation comes when the destruction has already been done…what a moment it would be to know that now things can never be changed again…
One of my friends got dumped recently and it was not a nice thing see her like that. So all night long she would tell me her ‘moments’ all negative ones she could remember at that time…after a week, she just remembered the nice ones the best ones with him. She said to me ‘although I got dumped but I will never be able to replace the amazing time I spent with him.’ so now she would remember the happier times with him. Good for her, but not every one is like her, we all after a break up tend to criticize the other one. I think that isn’t a great thing to do. What would one get criticizing her ex; I’d treasure all the memories and save it forever. As it defined me. To some it all;
Every day is precious,
Every day has a moment.
Moment’s make a lifetime…
….being in love is a moment
Being away from it also is a moment.
The firsts are moments
The last are as well.
So live life and define it.
Never criticize someone
Because someone would be doing
That to you as well.
And always be welcoming…..
When you meet someone
After years
Someone very dear,It would be a moment of your lifetime

Thursday, October 2, 2008

stop staring

You said that it
Was over,
And now,
You are trying to come closer.
Stop staring,
Stop breathing
Into my life again.

The blame game is over.
And you know
That I won the battle
In front of your mate.
The one who is swinging
Round you.
On this date.

You said that it
Was over,
And now,
You are trying to come closer.
Stop staring,
Stop breathing
Into my life again.

You wanted to run
Like always.
This time I didn’t
Stop you.
Tiered going around a maze.

Happier time with you are
Long over.
They are just so gone.
Be happy with your
Blond mate.
The one who is swinging
Round you.
On this date

You said that it
Was over,
And now,
You are trying to come closer.
Stop staring,
Stop breathing
Into my life again.

monoto.......yuk

for the past one fortnight i have been into medicines...one stupid thing will get over and the other would crop up.....there is no newspaper in my pg and that is also very irritating...i dont get to know whats going around me......my life presently is so monotonous that it smells stale....im craving to go home, craving to meet new people......the only thing which keeps me going is this internet...without wish i would probably hit myself on the wall

Saturday, September 27, 2008

you and me

What should I do?
Where should I go?
I know, no place
To go.

This cant be true.
We cant be through.
We were so near.

But now times have changed.
Now
Look it has rained.
My hopes
My dreams
My life is so free…

And I am no longer
Me.
It was just a dream…
You and me.
You and me.
You and me.

How can I live
When there is no faith
No faith that it exists.
That
Love exists.

What should I do?
Where should I go?
I know, no place
To go.

This cant be true.
We can’t be through.
We were so near.

But now times have changed.
Now
Look it has rained.
My hopes
My dreams
My life is so free…

And I am no longer
Me.
It was just a dream…
You and me.
You and me.
You and me.

what is...?

What is life?
Without sacrifice.

What is a kiss?
Without a risk.

What is love? Dear
Without a drop tea

Uncertainty fills our mind
All the time.

Chances we have to take
Even if our heart aches.

Friday, September 12, 2008

i will be fine

He comes to his beautiful nest with a heavy secret in his heart. He musters all the courage and sits with the women who means the world to him. All his promises to her are coming crashing down. As, his very own existence is in question. He knows he is dieing but he does not know how to tell her. How to tell to the women he loves?
After telling her so, she is broken. She can’t believe what she heard. How could this happen to her, to him. It was just not fair. Time was running away. He comes close to her and embraces her, to give her a false assurance.

I will be fine.
I know that.
It will take time.
I know that.
Till then,
Please be by my side.
As I am afraid to loose your sight.

In the brink,
of breaking up.
I am so shaking up.
To know that there
might be a day.
When I might
Not be there.

I will be fine.
I know that.
It will take time.
I know that.
Till then,
Please be by my side.
As I am afraid to loose you sight.


(There I go.
Do you know?
I am leaving you forever and ever.
To comeback; never and never)

I am afraid to loose your sight
So
Please be by my side.
I will be fine.
I know that it will take time.
I know that.
Till then,
Please be by my side.
As I am afraid to loose you sight.To loose you sight………….

Wednesday, August 27, 2008

holding your hand

Holding your hand.
I crossed all the tides.
Do you remember all those
Rides.
As I do.
Holding your hand.

My worries will be gone.
My smile is all that shone.
Holding your hand.

I was behind you.
My friend
My angle.
My hope
And my dreams.
Holding your hand.
Holding your hand.

You lost the grip.
And then I tripped.
I am lost. I cannot find you.

Tears are swimming in.
Please come so that they could
Remain in.
Come back
Please
Come back…

You held back my hands,
Held it as strong
As you never had.
I was now not
Walking behind you.

I was taking my chance.
I am going to be strong.
Without holding your hand.

I will cross the tide.
Cause I know…
You will be right by my side
Holding my hand
Holding my hand

Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Seven steps

Seven steps.
It’s just seven steps.
We can do it.
‘cause its just
seven steps.

Seven years of separation.
And years of temptations.
We finally are here,
But why this fear?
Its just seven steps,
Between us.
Seven steps
To burry the past.
Seven steps.
Lets do it fast.

Why do you look tensed.
Even when there is no fence.
No boundation,
No obligations.
‘cause we are done
listening to the world.

‘cause its been seven years,
since we last met, my dear.
Our lives have changed
Many people have failed.
But
Here you are
And there I am .

Seven steps.
Its just seven steps.
We can do it.
‘cause its seven steps.

Now the space is gone
Its just you and me.
The shackles are gone,
Its just you and me.

Oh it was so easy
Those
Seven steps are gone.
We did it

Sunday, July 27, 2008

a fairy tale

i wish i could fly,

without saying any good byes.



i wish i could love,

without being snubbed.



i wish i could be a princess,

and where all lovely dresses.



i wish i could be in a fairy tale.

where ,

a happy ending does'nt look frail.



i wish sometimes to be a movie star,

and throw my worries of the cart.



i wish to go to the moon.

and laugh at all the earthly fools.




i wish sometimes to be me.

which i have lost in some kind of hurry.





i wish i could be in a fairy tale.
where,
happy endings does'nt look frail.

MEN ARE DOGS

being a girl is not easy...trust me when i say this. earlier i never had to face the 'boy problem'. as i was either out wid my family or for that matters my best frnd in front of whoem no one could even sureley stare. but when i landed in this moronic unknown city, i had to learn one more trick to survive in this world. patience.

in these two years i learnt zillions of things about guys.

1) never get friendly with a guy from the word go. 'cause they will think that ladki phassi



2) never receive a guy's call late night. cause surely a bet would be involved.



3) there are 2 types of stares. one is like- oh ure so preety. and the second one is the most disgusting one as if there is something wrong wid ure wordrobe.



4) never ever take a pass of a guy lightly. if you dont stop it now it would increase a lot.



one of the most astonishing fact that a guy thinks is that they can easily get off by flirting with a girl. and that acts as an advantage actually. innitially i had to live with it as i thought and some girl frnds of mine advised me that i should not take any panga's. but i think there is a limit to every thing.

so now if a guy paases a comment i turn right back and stare the hell out of them. its apleasure to see them that wayz actually.

and if a certain decorum is crossed.... then something like this would happen

i was walking down the street at around 7:30 wid my hostle mate when a guy who happened to be from my institiute whistled. i turned right back but my friend told me to ignore and so i did. and as soon as i turned i heared a very disgusting remark made on me.

all hell broke loose. i charged to him, grabbed his colour and told him to appologise before i called up the director. there was a silence in the entire street as if a nuclear explosion has happened. he applogised though and said it wont happen again.......

some might say i acted dumb or may be that i was courageous enough to do it. but i felt gr8.....being a girl is not a crime but i feel one has to take a stand . not every time my dad or buddy will be there to take care of me.

just three weeks back i was taking part in a seminar. and my picture was takin by an unknown lad. i walked up to him and demanded for hiss cell phone to which he refused. i was like- ok you invited the trouble. after the seminar got over and while he was smirking as if he has done something great i told him to give his cell phone or i would call in the organisers. he thought i was just lieing. but then some seniors of mine came out to help me. there 2 pictures clicked and each of which was deleted. i was so happy.....well men are dogs but they are different in breeds....some are street some are poodles and some the great den.......

at the end of it all i would say.........its stupid to be quite so get up and take a stand....its the 21st century for christ sake.....

Friday, July 25, 2008

Love is a many splendid thing. Love lifts us up where we belong. All you need is love! ~ from the movie Moulin Rouge ~

Other men said they have seen angels, But I have seen thee And thou art enough. ~ by G. Moore ~

I would fly you to the moon and back if you'll be . . . if you'll be my baby. ~ From a song by Savage Garden ~

I love you - those three words have my life in them. ~ by Alexandrea to Nicholas III ~

What lies behind us, and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us. ~ by Ralph Waldo Emerson ~


I have been astonished that men could die martyrs for their religion - I have shudder'd at it. I shudder no more. I could be martyr'd for my religion Love is my religion And I could die for that. I could die for you. ~ by John Keats ~


I'd like to run away From you, But if you didn't come And find me ... I would die. ~ by Shirley Bassey ~

When you love someone, all your saved-up wishes start coming out. ~ by Elizabeth Bowen (1899-1973) ~

The greatest thing you'll ever learn Is to love and be loved in return. ~ From "Unforgettable with Love" by Natalie Cole

the lady in black

i am done.

i am done,crying for you.

i am done.

i am done, begging to you

now its time,

time for the old me.

its time for the lady in black,

to, comeback.

people were wishing for it too.

so now, the lady is back.



wearing a red dress.

and a trendy high heel.

i went to a discotheque.

to reinvent me.....

every eyes were on me.

as the lady is back.

the lady in black is back.

people were wishing for it too.

so now the lady is back.



now a sip of vodka, which goes down in my throat.

i see you with a blond.

and my heart takes a dip.

but i am done, sweety.

done crying for you.

and i come towards you, to say.

the lady in black is back,

people were wishing for it too.

so the lady is back

oh. she is back.

there's a new lad in the hell.
he tries to offer me a drink
i look at you and smile...

'but now...everything is gone,
why cant i see you in a torn.
it does'nt matter to you .does it?
i loved you soo much.
did you ever get it?'

but i am done,

crying for you.

i am done, waiting for you.

its time for the old me.

so i grab the lad's hand

and then.

every body screams...

the lady in black is back...

we were wishing for it too.

so the lady is back..

yes...she is back.

to rule our heart...

the blue dress

wearing a blue dress,
i waited in the street.
for you to come and take me away.
now the dark clouds have set in.
my mascara is running out.
i have been waiting since the dawn.
the stars are coming new.
but where are you?
now, the lilies ask me.
where is my prince,
that shrewd friend of mine
is giving me a wink.
but i know you'll come
'cause you told me you'll come.
you promised i was your Cinderella,
and you will be my umbrella.

i am all drenched,
but my hopes are ignited still,
whatever the world says,
I'll come again.
again, at the break of dawn.
like I've been coming since long.
wearing the same old
blue dress you gave me.
I'll come again,
again and again, every dawn.

my knight in shining armour

it was a beautiful night.
it was soo bright.
i had never been so awestruck
by a magnificent structure.
and there he was at a distance
my knight in shining armour.

all through the darkness,
i was playing with my eyes.
trying to avoid his
two pair of concavity.

oh, how i wished he could hold me.
oh, i wish he could just look at me.
after all he was a dream,
he was my knight in shining armour.

in a span of one, two, three,
he was coming closer to me.
my life had never been so adventurous,
what was cute, was that he was so
flirtatious.

all through the darkness,
i was playing with my eyes'
trying to avoid his two pair
of concavity.

months went by,
many moons had gone by.
i had a fantasy, within me.
he had captured my
imagination.
after all he was my knight,
in shinning armour.

he was perfect.
i mean, he still is.
but, happiness is short lived.
i always knew he had to drift.
he was going away to be with someone,
my eyes had moistened,
as i was not the one.

all through the darkness
i was playing with my eyes.
trying to avoid his two pair
of concavity.

he is gone, but he still lives.
he is a friend, even if i am stiffed.
its important to be happy,
as he once said like a four year old baby.

life makes you meet, wonderful people,
never let them go.
its a bad world,
where you dont find friends.
every now and then.
even if,
(i accepted)
he was not my knight in shinning armour...

Thursday, July 24, 2008

you left me...?

why should I cry,
why should I wait,
why should I f eel so lonely.
just because you left me?

I will not remain lonely.
I will party every time.
I'll smile wider every time.
why should i think of you?
because you left me?

I can carry on,
without you.
I can love the spring,
without you.
I can live without you.
but why did you leave me?

Its been a while now,
the seasons have changed twice.
I have someone else
to love me.
but i still don't know,
why...?
why am I still waiting for you?
why am I still in love with you?
why did you leave me?
just because you had to leave me?

jonasmania

this entry is because my sis is jonafied......
few months back i got a frantic call from her. and the only word i coud listen was 'jonas brothers'. i had absolutely no idea what she was talking about..in a week i got to know as i was locked up wid my computer and made to hear all their songs and youtube video. i got very irritated and left the room.
later that night i creep ed out to my lappy and heard the songs......i had been jonafied as well.....
i dont know why so many girls have become crazy about this rock band.....is it their personality or their songs.....i dont know...
but the fact that they have become a hysteria round the globe speaks volume of their success.
if you still dont know what i am talking about then fellas go and start surfin the net for their songs......cause they are so refreshing and young...hear especially 'when you look me in the eyes' (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-ZBoPlCzuRY)and 'please be mine'.....
the band comprises of joe nick and kevin jonas. all brothers, but it is joe who is the eye candy to my sis..........
being very critical about music, the jonas brothers have been like a welcome change actually......since all my other favourite rock bands are getting old.....i hate to admit it
check out r=their latest hit single burning up and trust me you'll bless me http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0z1kSdk7y1A

and i hope truly hope sis that one day you'll see their concert..

they are a rage and are here to stay for a looong time

why cant we care?

last tuesday was a historic day for indian politics. well the trust vote happened and congress won. of course they were many filmy twists like MP's taking out cash and declaring they were traded, or lalu yadav singing hindi film songs( that was so irritating...go to indian idol instead) and the cherry on the cake was rahul gandhi who after appraising mr. vajpai demanded that the BJP leaders should clap.........(how sarcastic one can get)
at the end mr singh was happy that his madam S was smiling all the way.......
but the bottom line is .......how many watched the whole drama or went ahead to see kismat konnection...
i was told by my mates that if i dare switch on the television and put on the news i will be slaughtered.......
my agaony was no bound for the simple fact.....why cant they care wts going on in the country..
saifu and bebu had a fight...so what will it impact the world?
or that some stupid reality show is coming where there is high pitched drama.....?
are we the 'youngistan' are shallow minded........?
well on pondering deeply for two days i have concluded that people give importance to those things which matters to them...like IPL, euro cup and the Tuesday saga was important to me, it mattered my digestion
in the same manner it was important to see what exactly happened at katrina's birthday party?
but still.......it should be pondered.....do we really care what is going on in our country even if it does not affect our lives......

lets tell the world

i always knew there was some one for me...
like i always knew that the sun smiles to me
i was waiting for you in the cloudy misty
rainy days of my life
and you came in my paradise
and you will remained with me
till eternity...ties...

c'mon...lets tell the world
lets tell from the rooftop
that we are together
now forever.....forever.....and ever and ever

in the green flushes of the city
with all kinds of beautiful lilies
we would stay
as the rain would pour down
i'll take you in my arms
i wont care what the other lasses might think
i wont look at granies
i'll just look at you
i'll just look into you
you know why
because i want to tell the world
lets tell from the rooftop
that we are together
now forever.....

i am crazy for you from the day i saw you
i waited till you could be with me
i dreamt day and night of you
and now here we are in this rude world
which never understood my love for you
thats why i say

c'mon...lets tell the world
lets tell from the rooftop
that we are together
now forever.....forever.....and ever and ever
from the rooftop
we are together
not just for now but forever and ever and ever and ever

for you

there you go...in the crowd...of strangers
there you go...wiping ure tears
dont go....my darling
dont.....leave me....leave me all alone..
i am waiting for you in my arms.
for you

remember the sunshine who woke us up together
or the flowers who were standing still
your eyes were smiling but you didnt say a word
i was waiting to hear that you were mine
now forever
dont go my darling dont leave me
,,,leave me all alone.
i am waiting for you in my arms.
for you

love ...u till eternity
i'll wait for you till you come back to me
when you will realize
that we were ment to be together
i would be gone
you would be near so turn back............

there you go in the crowd...of strangers
there you go...wiping ure tears...
on the street dont go....my darling
dont.....leave me....leave me all alone..
i am waiting for you in my arms.
for you come back i know
you want to
i'll be waiting for u till i die
i am waiting for u in my arms
for u