NOT JUST ANOTHER GIRL

LATELY

2010-06-06T01:47:00.000-07:00

Lately, they say I am smiling all the time…

That I walk when it rains light.

And suddenly the world looks strange

With you

Everything looks rearranged.

We jump over our troubles

And then we tightly snuggle…

You ask me every time with doubt

If I will always be around

And I tell you the same thing

That all I am asking is for a ring….

I try and walk on your foot prints

Trying to be what you thought

Of me and wrote it with ink.

We are far above the rest

And happy in our own quest…

Let distances be just a line

And it shall frail on time.

HAPPILY UNMARRIED

2010-04-21T09:23:00.001-07:00

More women are now opting for live-in relationships thanks to financial independence and judicial backing. If Lord Krishna and Radha could live together why can't lesser mortals? You may find that argument unusual but that's actually the observation of the Supreme Court when the question of whether live-in relationships are immoral came up. But will the apex court's comment wipe off the stigma and prejudices attached to co-habitation?

Aayush Malhotra and Sakshi Kapoor's love story smacks of a Bollywood romance, starting with a ragging session in college where Malhotra was a senior student and Kapoor at the receiving end. But it was all in fun and both grew closer during their term in college and the relationship continued long after they bagged their degrees. Their careers brought them both to Gurgaon where they decided to live in. Malhotra owned an apartment in Gurgaon so Kapoor just had to move in - that spared them the ordeal of house-hunting. They were also lucky they had their way with their respective families. As for legal acceptance - that never really bothered them. Living together is about individual choice and not legal acceptability, they say. It's compatibility that counts," says Malhotra, who runs a construction business. With call centre executive Kapoor's erratic working hours playing spoilsport, they get to catch up only on weekends. "Except for living together, our lives haven't changed much. Both of us spend long hours at work, eat out lot, and are penniless by the end of the month," laughs Malhotra. The couple is, however, non- committal about marriage: "It's too early to think about and we haven't discussed it yet." But yes, they aren't entirely oblivious to the attitude of society - it does put them off. "The notion that the couples have a lot of fun and it's all about sex. One should understand that it's a mutual decision taken by two adults despite society's rigid, moralistic stand. We took the step aware of the consequences," says Malhotra.

LIVE-IN AND LET LIVE-IN

For many like Kapoor and Malhotra, living is a convenient arrangement. Childhood friends Sumit Srivastava, software engineer, and Smita Pandey, media professional, decided to stay together after both them moved to Delhi for work. Both had different working hours and saw very little each other. "It was as good as living in different cities so we decided to live in to spend quality time together. It was a well thought-out decision. We didn't rush into it," says Pandey. Now four years into it, Pandey feels life has changed for the better. "In a romantic relationship, you never fully understand your partner. I have seen friends parting ways after a love marriage. In a live-in relationship, one gets to know the partner's merits and demerits. The pressure is less compared to that in a marriage and if it doesn't work, one is free to move out," says Pandey, who feels that cohabitation makes couples more responsible. Weekends, for instance, are for finishing household work. Cleaning up, cooking, doing the laundry, everything is a joint effort. Sumit has become more responsible. I never thought he would change so drastically," laughs Pandey. She feels that legal cover would certainly bring more social acceptability to such relationships in the long run. "If anything, it will make house-hunting smoother... but it's high time society woke up to such trends," says Pandey. Getting a house on rent was a nightmare for Pandey and Srivastava. "People treat you like an anti-social and we attract half-smiles and smirks from people," says Srivastava.

HOUSE THAT

Being IIT aluminis and drawing fat salaries wasn't enough for Nisha Menon and Amit Kapoor (name changed) to get a house on rent. After a whirlwind affair as students at IIT Kharagpur, Menon shifted to Delhi from Pune to join Kapoor as distance was taking a toll on their relationship. "We had to lie that we were married. Our first landlord demanded a marriage certificate and we bought some time from him citing technical reasons," says Kapoor. Menon, a consultant with an MNC has been staying with Kapoor, creative head of a production company, for the last two years. The couple will the knot next week, but Menon avers that a live-in relationship is the best test to gauge compatibility. The couple also had to put up with some tricky situations when Menon's parents landed in Delhi to visit their daughter. "Every time her parents visited, I would have to pack my bags and sleep in my office. Recently, at my cousin's wedding, all my relatives wanted to know where I lived. It was tough avoiding their questions," laughs Kapoor.

WINDS OF CHANGE

Are we seeing more youngsters choosing live-in arrangements? Social scientists and psychologists say there is a rise in the number of live-in relationships, thanks to growing financial independence among women and the impact of urban lifestyle. "We see many youngsters opting for live-in relationships. There is a gradual shift in societal attitude towards such relationships, though not a drastic one and it's catalysed by legal acceptance among other factors," says sociologist Shiv Viswanathan.

His view is backed by psychologist and lifestyle expert Dr Rachna Singh. "We do see a significant rise certainly... I would say women, asserting their financial independence, has a major role in it. There's a shift in mindset also. Couples often opt for cohabitation as it's a convenient arrangement. Many use it as a litmus test to check out compatibility before marriage," says Singh. She adds that Bollywood movies such as Salaam Namaste and Wake Up Sid is also responsible for giving a fresh perspective to live-in relationships.

But Singh also points out the flip side: "Sometimes, live-in relationships lack commitment as the couples don't work hard on it like in a marriage. So they break up for minor reasons. In marriages, it's much tougher to get a divorce."

However, Viplav Gaurav, assistant director with a production house and Meenakshi Singh, a public relations professional, don't quite agree with this view. "I feel the commitment level is the same as in a marriage. Besides, we share all expenses and household work equally," says Gaurav. Even though Gaurav's new job took him to Mumbai eight months back, their bond is still as strong as ever, the couple says.

ORDER, ORDER!

In a recent observation, the Supreme Court had backed actor Khushboo's controversial comments on pre-marital sex and live-in relationships saying there was nothing illegal in such ties between adults. But does the legal acceptability change ground reality? Pinky Anand, counsel for actor Khushboo, says, "Civil society will definitely take notice of these observations." But Supreme Court lawyer Kamini Jaiswal feels no law will change the scenario unless society wakes up to change. "Law won't make a difference, mindsets have to change. Under the Domestic Violence Act, a woman in a live-in relationship can receive compensation if the relationship falls apart," she says.

However, Semanti Sinha Ray, who got married after a live-in for six years with her husband Amit Mehra, argues: "I don't understand why an adult needs permission to live with anyone, provided one is not unduly disturbing society. Living-in does not result in drunken orgies every night. More married couples create problems than live-in ones" argues Ray.

However, Sandhya Gokhale, who is in a live-in relationship for the past 13 years, believes that legal binding will prevent disadvantaged women from exploitation. "It will entitle them to property rights and compensation. It also kind of says that the current system of marriage doesn't work for women," says Gokhale, a Mumbai-based software consultant.

KNOTTY ISSUES

Do live-in relationships necessarily result in marriage? "Marriage is certainly at the back of their mind, so if it doesn't work it's mostly the women who feel shattered," says Singh. But Ray rules out any emotional compulsion to get married. "We lived together for six years. We knew we were made for each other when we met. Then our parents suggested that since we were in a permanent relationship, we should get married in case children came along and so we did. Our status hasn't changed except that we have an extra set of parents," says Ray, who runs a production company Amp Angels with her husband.

If some fall for parental pressure, others feel they need social acceptability. But there are couples who rebel against the institution of marriage and carry on with their live-in status. Gokhale and her partner Mihir Desai, a human rights lawyer, have no plans to get married after 13 years of co-habitation. "I am against the institution of marriage as it's based on unequal footing. Women are expected to don specific roles in a marriage. Most live-ins end up in marriage as conforming to social rule is easier than taking it on," she adds. That might be a debatable statement.

FLIPSIDE ISSUES

Getting a house on rent is the biggest hurdle so many have to lie about their relationship. But some landlords have wised up to the trend and demand to see the marriage cerificate.

Arrange for an alternative stay as your partner's parents or relatives may pay a visit sometimes.

Learn to deal with silly comments and knowing smiles.

Guess what. The Supreme Court's observation that living-in is not immoral was welcomed by many. The remark was made during a hearing on filmstar Khushboo's comments on premarital sex

preetha.nair@mailtoday.in

just mine

2010-04-16T05:17:00.000-07:00

"when i look into your eyes.

i only see that you are mine.

but the insecurities don't easily fade away.

i don't know the reason or this sway.

probably because soon it will come to an end.

so let us simply pretend

that this is for life...

and that you are just mine"

miss you

2010-04-15T08:51:00.000-07:00

"im becoming everything you wanted me to be...everything i thought i couldn't be. i don't feel alienated anymore as little by little i am coming close. few hours back i realized...what it would be when you would fly. i stood in the middle waiting you would stop and you did. i clutched you with my arms while you asked me to hang on...."

YOU

2010-04-12T22:38:00.000-07:00

you make me cry you make me laugh.

you make me wonder sense in every crap.

you act stupid yet genius sometimes.

you know when nothing is fine.

you find legality in every thing which is illegal.

you make people believe that you easily mingle.

you don't like movies or parties as you say.

you don't even know how to mail.

you spiritual quest makes no sense.

you look at every girl with a magnified lens.

you love your brands too much.

you fail to make me understand this fuss.

you are an idiot and a moron.

you sweetly use a roll on.

you are just you and no ones is like you.

you hate Chinese cuisine and anything veg.

you will definitely say well said!!

4 mnth update

2010-04-10T05:41:00.000-07:00

all geared up...wearing my favorite jeans and tee almost 3 rd time in the last 10 days, i am waiting for two of lovely sweethearts to relish Chinese food. i guess at the the end of the day its not really about how much you spent or the liters of petrol went buy, or even sometimes how late it gets...its really about having a good time with a good company. After a long time i feel that my life in doon is all rockin. in pg... life is absolutely wonderful except of course the cold war between me and shveta which in all probability would mellow down, and outside, is absolute fun wid me shampz and monty freaking out...and sometimez even ashish sir.

i am beginning to act my age not like a total amma ji! i am giving time to studies, fun, food, family, friendz, bother, sister and love, widout any one of them overpowering the other. Thankfully because of a superb 300 rupees scheme of bsnl my mobile is not getting recharged every 3rd day...and shona and i get to talk to each other almost every hour...

spiritually i am doing well ...which is nice keeping in mind the ever nagging anu's interference in my practice of worship. i believe in good deeds. i believe that if i sincerely close my eyes for one minute and just remember the almighty, thank him for all the good things, and be sorry if i do something wrong.....that wht for me would be worship...

dont want to jinx it but man i enjoy my life

2010 is rocking all ready........!!!!

desert b4 lunch

2010-03-30T23:13:00.000-07:00

Feeling heavily inspired i hearby try and share a story, which is not even 24 hrs old. so now yesterday i was not well and i found comfort in sleeping. i had my boring pg lunch in which aunty claimed she made sambhar but none of us really buy that story.so with almost an empty tummy i resided to my bed again. soon though my knight in shining armour arhum aka monty aka rehman sahab aka betaji...called to say mummyji taiyaar ho jaiyae..now basically a call at 2 by him clearly means LUNCH...i quickly wore my teal blue skinny jeans and aqua green (branded ;-)) ganji...i quickly tied my hair wore my slip ones appleid a good quantity of sunscreen and waited. monty came and i sat on my hunk..the owner of which was clearly sitting already in the restaurant. in that 5 min ride i asked him almost 25 times y r u not studying tommoorw is ure board...."its hindi mummyj" came the prompt reply...
we reached our desert joint anandam to have lunch in their resturant. as we entered and the gateman giving us a grin and probably saying...'aagaye phirse'...we saw a dismayed figure with his head down. suprising was that there an tota sitting right opposite him...sigh...i felt bad for him...then all three of us went up to the restaurant only to find out that there tandoor is not working. papaji was already irritated and now he cld not eat his veg tanddor platter. betaji and mummyji...then tried to lure him by ordering malai kofta...we thought it would be nice...but papaji said it wont...he ordered his kesariya lassi and saying 'mera kuch nahi hoga...clat to clear ho ga hi nahi...'
beta ji surely wanted to give papaji a wack..and mummyji was busy looking calculating the bill in her mind. after few frustrating minutes the food arrived. mummyji as a tradition served in all the three plates. and then they took the bite. papaji wanted to kill mummy ji and betaji...mummy ji was not looking at papaji and betaji was saying were we here to have lunch or desert. unable to relish the food we gave up...with apology in our hearts we looked at papaji and said we will take you to another place for chiken...papaji said nothing just slurpped the kesariya lassi...we gave the waiter few faces paid the bill and came out.
betaji said lets go to dominos....papaji happily agreed...
upon reaching there mummyji was assured we are not leaving this place anytime soon. reason......sexy girls all arund...beta ji and papaji ki chandi...
mummyji sat quietly while they went to order...after 15 min utes mummyji was puzzled as to wts taking this much time?
a red top girl...
mummyji was furiuos at beta and papaji....but gladly ignored and started looking at a sekshy face...
after eating the first slice of the chiken pizza...mummy went blank and asked beta ji.....dude is it tuesday.....and the world was over her head.....mummy jee was eating chiken on tuesday and knowing neither hanuman ji nor her father would be glad...it did not really efect the other langoors who continued eating after giving her a lecture that either mummyji should not eat non veg at all or eat everyday......
mummyji said sorry to hanuman ji and finished her lunch........
betaji and papaji were glad that they did not stop her for eating non veg...
mummyji was dropped to her pg there after.....
yesterday wen mummyji asked betaji to get her bahu the next outing he refused...and said

'jab mil bethe teen yaar muummy ji betajia and papaji tab hoti hai shaam!!!'

illusions

2010-03-30T20:44:00.000-07:00

sub conscious mind. we all have it. its like a treasure really. thats one place where u can dream and u have absolute control in it. u can slap people in it, kiss them, take them down...create ure own ddlj...its one place where dreamz actually come true. but then those eyes open and u realize shit danmed it was a dream...the slap the kiss was all fake...i was not a vampire....runnning with my edward.....
psychology teaches us that repressed desires take forms of dreams...and this sub baby is very interesting.
so last night i dreamt that im in little blue dress and lukin almost like dia mirza...standing in a balcony..and then there are footsteps. i turn and there he is....edward....now i know its plain silly...its nonsense....but that one minute i thanked my mind for weaving such a beautiful scene.
nut fun happens when you are wide awake and the mind plays a trick. you think that the door would open and bang on that someone special will come by...
love this aspect of the human mind

When girls don't feel like it!!

2010-03-30T20:38:00.000-07:00

This was written by a guy.....it's pretty damn smart.

Girls -- Please have a sense of humor!

I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I have never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart.

FOR EXAMPLE:

One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed. Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, 'I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me.'

I said, 'WHAT??!! What was that?!'

So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear..

'You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man.'

She responded to my puzzled look by saying, 'Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?'

Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.

The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfit s. She couldn't decide which one to take, so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said, 'Lets get a pair for each outfit.'

We went on to the jewelry department where sh e picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you... She was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis

I think I threw her for a loop when I said, 'That's fine, honey.' She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, 'I think this is all
Dear, let's go to the cashier.'

I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, 'No honey, I don't feel like it.'

Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled, 'WHAT?'

I then said, 'Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman.'

And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, 'Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?'

Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either.......but at least that she knows I'm smarter than her.

what the hell is love?

2010-01-27T05:45:00.000-08:00

After carefully analyzing love for some years and through my friends experience i have concluded that one is in love when he or she feels complete in that persons presence. Being complete is a bliss one hopes for because not every one feels that serene composure. It's that utmost happiness one cannot describe and that no matter how mad you are at that person or how bad the day went that persons presence makes you smile and makes you forget every disturbance in your life. there is no age to fall in love. and frankly i don't believe that love just happens once. it can happen again as well. but yes true love just happens once. not every body finds true love and so if you do you should hold on to it, don't let it go. love is irreplaceable.

exam, moot and holiday

2010-01-21T23:12:00.000-08:00

Right now I am in shatabdi which is 45 minutes late and I am listening to ik tara while I return to my home. It has been quite an eventful month so far for me. So while I sit and hope to reach home quickly I can’t but look back.
The year actually started like a hangover of a new year’s party. It was the second time in my 22 years of existence that I was away from my parents and siblings on 1st of jan. this time though the separation did not sting me that much. Probably because I did not have time for that. The exams , the luthra, my possessive best friend, kept me at my toes. The exams were fun this year. It did not seem to bog me down that much. I don’t even know the reason for that actually. Probably it was the affect of the weather in dehradun which saw me being wrapped in my shawl and being inside the blanket. My hibernation phase was totally messed up.
(In case you did not know in winters I hibernate. Even if you tell me that ranbir has asked me out I might drag him inside the blanket but I won’t move. It has been a serious headache for my mum who detested this behavior on my part and that is the exact reason why my waist size increases in these months.)
Desperately waiting for 11th I got into the habit of my sister of crossing every date in my sai baba’s calendar. On 3rd of jan I finally remembered nishi’s birthday which for the past 4 years have forgotten or wrongly remembered. But I did remember and wasn’t she glad! Moving on nothing substantial happened till 11th. Finally my exams were done and I knew for one thing that it was the only day that I could in fact freak out.
But that did not really happen. What happened was that upma and me were picked up by smit sir and later dropped at our pg. I was given roughly 10 minutes to dress up so that we could go and shop for me which was supposed to be done on the 12th. Another trivia about me is that I can get ready in 5 minutes and you multiply that by 6 and that’s the amount of time that both my sister and my brother take.
So as mentioned that we were supposed to shop but that did not actually happen. What happened for the next 2 hours was him buying 2 shirts, one for his uncle and one for himself. I was almost about to whack him in indra market in front of a beautiful girl he was looking at when he cracked one of his personally created non sense jokes. So when finally the shirt was bought I got hungry. But he was absolutely in no mood to feed me. But being me I dragged him to anandam to have cholle bahture, more than half of which he ate while saying am not really hungry! Like I will ever buy that.
Moving on I was dropped back to my place and I resorted to my lovely and not so cold bed. After struggling for 30 minutes to sleep since my sis and ayu kept on calling me as soon as I was about to go to my lovely dreams featuring me and Robert, my cell phone rang again and it flashed the name of smit sir.
Next what happened in a line telling me to come down.
Frustrating.
Reaching there I realized that poor monty and me were being forced to go to a mutton shop to buy mutton. Forgetting the decency within a senior junior relationship or the fact being that monty was sitting there I gave him series of hits. Anyhow both me and monty were dropped and shown some attitude which we chose to ignore.
Between 12th and 13th nothing substantial happened except roaming around with my gal pals shopping eating and gearing my self for the moot. On 14th I was dropped at isbt by in total 2.5 men. They being smit sir aashish sir and ashu. I did not really understand the reason for them of making ashu get up so early (6) to drop me. That day I stamped officially that my dear smit sir had absolutely no brains. What in fact was more idiotic that I was the only girl in a group of 4.5 men ( sam and laval sir ) when they were checking out girls.
Finally after a tiresome journey and finding our escort I reached the meghdoot hostel of the north delhi university campus. While I was treading to my room my idiotic team companions were betting if I will cry. But I did not. My roomie was a very sweet little girl uma. The night was warm as well, probably because it was not as cold as it was in doon. In the morning we were woken up by 7 since the breakfast was served at 7: 30. I was joyful since I had a glass of milk after a long time, followed by bread and butter and 2 boiled eggs plus an orange. In few hours we were to reach the campus law centre for our registrations. I wore my formals and took a rikshaw to cover a distance of less than a kilometer. The place was filled with blacks and whites and being lost was not my worry. I was worried for the boys. Why? Well because they were too many good looking girls, unfortunate that our escort for the next two days was a girl called ginny. Outside the campus was a stall of raju Maggie and I ate a big plate of hot and yummy Maggie. The inauguration ceremony started. I was not interested in the Cambridge team or the team from Pakistan or a pony tailed fellow who was busy staring at me. I was interested in mr siddharth luthra.
After the inauguration the teams were to taken to the lawn for tea. So while my mates were busy hogging food I was busy sitting since my temperature soared and I was not feeling well. Thankfully time came to leave and I recognized the nalsar team as we researched together at isil. We passed smiles of recognition. The next day was our preliminaries.
I got up early and skipped my breakfast and met my team. The first round we knew would be easy since the memorial of the first team was flawed. It was a cake. I wasn’t even grilled by the judges, but then the second round came and I realized in one second that I was not competing with the opposite team but the judges and one judge in particular. Upon seeing how devilishly he was grilling sameer I prayed he does not cry and I could actually see horns over the judge’s head. My turn came soon and I was ready. I was not spared as well. Series of questions followed and i countered each one of them. Thankfully he agreed to my defenses. Upon reaching back to my seat and looking at the other team being screwed, sameer dropped a bomb at me in the last minute and that was that I was suppose to rebut and not him. I wanted to give him a big kick but before I could say anything I was called. I missed my original co-mooter who would never do something like that.
Quickly the round got over and before the judge went away he told me I was good. The results were to be announced at 6 and I had with me good 4 hours where I did nothing.
Finally the results were out. Out of 46 teams only 13 could manage 2 wins. The names were announced and we were in the top 13. but in order to reach the next round you were to be in the top 8 based on the memorial score. It was at this juncture that we lost. It felt bad and wishing if I could go back in time and could have made a better memorial.
The next day came quickly and after an hours journey via bus we reached the habitat centre for the semis and the finals. The final was between nalsar and glc. I wanted nalsar to win not because I knew them but ….actually because I knew them.
The round was impressive. The das boy was too good. I was not surprised that he got the best speaker, he did infact deserved it. GLC though won but most of us felt that it should have been nalsar.
Prize distribution happened which concluded in an ugly spat between my juni and me ( I don’t want to account the details). As soon as uma and I reached our hostel we picked our belongings and hired an auto…
After 3 hours I was sleeping with my cousins at my mausis’s place. Yesterday I stayed sitting on the couch and seeing every random thing possible on television. My dinner was to be with amber which went exactly I thought it would be; shouting at the top of our voices for some absurd topic, which he was not fine with it. An idealist can never be easily convinced.
The month is not over and I don’t really know what the next 2 weeks of this month are brining for me. I just know that I want to be in my hibernating mode.
Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

2009- the year that was

2010-01-07T05:16:00.001-08:00

sometimes there are some defining years in your life. for me it would be 2009. the year did not start really wid a bang but after years i took a resolution. i was not sure if i would be able to fulfill that promise of mine. but an unrelenting faith held me strong and told me that i should do it. It was high time. it had been 2 years and time was ticking away. i knew it would take me time but this time i had my heart to it. I did not want to wait any longer.
For me frndz have been really important so much that i placed one of them even ahead of my relatives. He was supposedly a gr8 guy. Always there. i thought he is one guy who can never change. Who will remain the same. I called him my best frnd. And he turned out to be the biggest asshole i have ever met in my life. He made my sister cry and he made my heart and trust bleed. he stabbed me on my back. It turned out that the person i thought was my confidante was painting my talks to someone else as well. Time and again i have tried to call him and subsequently abuse him but i am not able to. i have never hated someone in my entire life the way that i hate him to the core of my heart. I cant think good of him or wish that good things happen to him. i just wish the way he has hurt not only me and my sis but also my family's trust in him...i wish he pays for it.
The almighty would not be pleased of me wishing downfall for someone but when that person is pure satan i could curse him every day of the rest of my life till he begs forgiveness for his act. He made me do though something else. His exit made me start afresh with most of my other frnds whom i had forgotten as i was content with just his friendship.
I reconnected wid noaaman and radhika and i hold these two people in high regards.
My hostel life also was rocky shoky. chetna went away to chandigarh and i miss her a lot. Even though she probably lead a secret life she was the best roomie i could have ever asked for. Anu and i had series of tiff. she though got engaged and now all geared to get married. she decided to bury our differances but just few days ago i got to know that she sneaked into my room and read my diary. only my sister has the authority to read my diary. i cant forgive that.
Thus the cold war is back on and the only difference being that she does not know about that. and going with that i wont be going to jaipur to attend her marriage. I dont know if its right or wrong but i just know i cant act that i am fine. i have decided thus that no more being nice to people i dont like. Behave with them the way they behave with me.
Another thing visibly happened with me that i finally i decided to live in the present. Its tough but i dnt really live blindly i still think of the future but i dont let it now over power my decision. I listen to my instincts now. It took me a lot of time actually to adapt to it but im more happy than i have ever been.
2009 will always be remembered as i allowed myself to be happy again. I feel complete i feel blessed. And for what ever time this happiness is there with me i want to live every moment of it as i know its for a short time.
realized as well that how much kukki's friendship means to me,even though we have our issues regarding the thoughts and choices we are frnds for life.
By the end of the year and as 1st jan 2010 began i realized that the resolution i took last year is fulfilled im finally done wid mt haunting past, because i am now happy where i am today.
2010 has started and i know its going to be a challenging year for me. i'll enter to my last year of college life and pathetically within 6 mnths shampy would go away...shveta will leave as well. He has been instrumental in making me get adapted to this city and without him i know i will feel lost. So i need to start being strong and prepare my life in doon without him in doon.
lets c how this year goes i hope really i dont break another heart cause it feels pathetic to break a heart of a guy who says he loves me...by saying no to him.
i missed my granny a lot the past year (dadi), there were times i cried. when my frnds showed off there home made sweaters, i took out the black sweater my dadi had knit for me (her very last swaeter)held it strongly and cried. i remembered my biggest regret again of failing to tell her that how much i loved her. i still have her sweater which she used to wear, wid me, and i wont be parting with it.
my nani got ill as well, but now she is strong as well.
and still the favourite place for my would be mum's lap. and i am still my dudda's gal for whom the last year got loadz of happiness...
untill next year....
all the best devina....

.......

2009-11-08T11:02:00.000-08:00

"EVERY DAY I TRY TO LOVE HIM THE WAY I LOVED YOU...RANDOMLY FOOLISHLY I THINK WHY HE IS NOT YOU.BUT THEN AGAIN ITS DESTINY THAT YOU FOUND LOVE AGAIN IN HER ARMS AND ITS MINE TO TRY TO BE HIS IN HIS ARMS. I LOOK ACROSS THE ROOM AND SEE A BUNCH OF LOVELY FLOWERS AND A SMILE ON MY FACE TELL ME THAT THE RUST IS SETTLING DOWN.THE LAST THREAD IS STILL THERE AND I WONDER WHEN WILL IT GO, WONDER WHEN WILL I STOP WORRYING ABOUT THE WRINKLES ON YOUR BROWS...SOMETIMES I FEEL IT WILL ALWAYS REMAIN BECAUSE THE ASHES OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD STILL REMAIN. NO MATTER HOW HIS ARMS HOLD ME OR HIS LIPS KISS ME I ALWAYS DESIRE A LAST WISH,THAT JUST ONE DAY ME YOU COULD MISS .I ALWAYS THOUGHT YOU ARE WEAK BUT YOUR STRENGTH OVER POWERED ME. A WOMEN CAN LOVE JUST ONCE THEY SAY I DON'T REALLY REPLY BECAUSE I DONT KNOW IF ITS TRUE. I LOVE YOU STILL DEEP DEEP DOWN BELOW, BUT I HOLD HIS HAND TODAY AND HAPPINESS IS ALL WHAT I SHOW " ~

its complicated because you make it one

2009-11-08T01:22:00.000-08:00

so why do i stop being friendly to a guy who falls in for me and especially when i thought he is a frnd...well simply because its irritating, because from day one you made it clear that you dnt appreciate that....and also its suffocating, because you tend to start questioning all the good little deeds he did for you, that was not because he was being ure frnd but because he wanted you to like him...why am i writing this because i got to know through an electronic devise that a person i thought was a frnd has fallen in love with me and has written soo much abt me. and hence the biggest help i could provide him right now iz the fact of not being his frnd anymore because only that would make him move on from me...so tomorrow wld probably be the last day i see him, and then my guy wld tell him that he needs to take a step back from my life, i know it would be harsh, but then that is also the cure because i cant stick around him anymore. no matter wt i say regarding the person with whom i'll spend the rest of my life with, the fact is, that it is beyond the kundli and brahmin crap and that is sense of being complete and happy. friendship is of course the first step to love but it is not the thing only. it requires many more things. few weeks back a close buddy of mine told me that i need to act differently wid my female pals and my male ones and i did not really understand it until now, and i stand corrected. if i spend a nice quality time wid someone its because of the company i enjoy and not that i like him like him. and nor my parents are soo blind that just because a person shares my caste i'll be married off to him because no matter what it is my decision and my parents are no hitler for crying out loud.i am not against love marriage or love in general,,,how can i? its one of the most beautiful things in the world to experience it but being in love with ure eyes closed is insane. i feel sorry for him but i am angry as well.he is no different than the guy for whom he was campaigning earlier.
so this is my vent of frustration...

RAHUL gandhi finally arrives....seems so

2009-05-05T05:51:00.001-07:00

Rahul Gandhi: No more a political 'Pappu'

Renu Mittal in New Delhi

May 05, 2009 17:49 IST

Rahul Gandhi [Images] took some time took off from his hectic campaigning schedule to address a packed press conference in New Delhi [Images] on Tuesday.

The Gandhi scion, widely touted to be the prime-minister-in-waiting, answered almost each question clearly and painstakingly.

While there was nothing new or startling in his answers, they conveyed the sincerity of an earnest young man who is neither shrill nor loud. Though he sounded like a political novice possessing a fair degree of clarity on certain issues, the confidence in his speech and gait was the result of canvassing across the political landscape of the country.

After the press conference, a Congress activist who has been critical of the young Gandhi, observed, "Pappu paas ho gaya". He admitted that he was impressed by Gandhi's manner of speaking, adding, "It looks like he is on the way to becoming a political leader."

The political buzz so far indicated that Rahul, who is referred to as 'Pappu' by both Congress activists and journalists, was detached and disinterested in the Congress' affairs. There has been a perceptibly stronger demand for the more politically savvy, articulate and charismatic Priyanka, who is seen as a Gandhi who can take the Congress to greater heights. But she has made it clear that politics is not her immediate priority, and disconsolate Congressmen have started looking at Rahul as the next best alternative.

But not many in the Congress, or outside it, know much about Rahul, the leader chosen by his mother, Congress chief Sonia Gandhi [Images], to carry forward the family legacy.

The ease and confidence with which Rahul spoke on issues which, according to him, are central to national politics, revealed a balanced leader who is not afraid to call a spade
a spade, even if it does not help the Congress' cause in the middle of Parliamentary elections.

Rahul revealed that he was 'emotional' about his current relationship with the Youth Congress and the National Students' Union of India. He made it clear that any attempt to downsize or downplay their role in building up the Congress party would be construed as an insult to the Youth Congress.

But there is more to Rahul's press conference than meets the eye.

Before holding the press conference held at Hotel Ashoka, the Gandhi scion had two sets of limited interactions, behind closed doors, with journalists from English newspapers. On both occasions, he ignored the representatives from the vernacular press, which help in the formation of public opinion in far flung areas of the country.

When the concerned journalists created a furore over the 'elitist discrimination', the press meet was thrown open to the entire media.

Gandhi also contradicted his own belief -- that the goals of growth ,development and poverty eradication can be achieved only by political parties which have achieved intra-party democracy -- when he refused to answer questions about the lack of a democratic structure within the Congress.

When it was pointed out that there were no elections to important bodies like the Congress Working Committee and there was no accountability on the part of senior leaders and chief mininisters, Gandhi ignored the query and launched an eulogy on the work being done by the Youth Congress and the NSUI in Punjab and Gujarat, where he had sought to democratise the organisation and hold elections.

Incidentally, former Punjab chief minister Beant Singh's [Images] grandson was 'elected' as the leader through this 'democratic process'. And there is no information on what happened to the other aspirants to that position.

But Gandhi still comes across as a young man who does not believe in living in the past. He believes that it is important to sustain the nine per cent growth rate of Dr Manmohan Singh [Images] so that the poor and the deprived can benefit from the social sector schemes and development projects.

In spite of the fact the Congress might need to drum up the Left's support after the election to form the central government, Gandhi made it clear that he believed that the Left was an old party with old ideas.

He cited their view on the India-United States nuclear agreement as an example, claiming that it revealed their outdated thinking.

Gandhi pointed out that the Left wanted to help the poor and backed the 'Rozgar yojana scheme' of the Centre but was against the nine per cent growth rate at the same time.

"So where do they think the money will come from to fund the schemes for the poor," he
asked, saying that he had basic differences with them in terms of ideology and the approach towards economic liberalisation.

At the risk of further alienating the Left parties, he doggedly and persistently continued to back Dr Singh as the best prime minister the country can have.

Rahul also expressed confidence that after the election, the Left will support the Congress and Dr Singh, adding, "The Left will support a Dr Manmohan Singh government. We will deliver him as the prime minister".

But Rahul, a product of the secular politics and thinking of the Nehru-Gandhi family, stressed that there could be no meeting ground with the Bharatiya Janata Party [Images], as both their economic and political ideologies would never match. He brought up the 'massacre of Muslims in Gujarat, the killings of Christians in Orissa and the anti-minority vote bank politics of the BJP," to substantiate his point.

But Rahul, the fledgling politician, appears to have come of age to some extent. Waging a psychological warfare on the BJP, he asserted that the BJP has given up the fight midway through the elections. The National Democratic Alliance exists only in the mind of the BJP, declared Gandhi, adding that evidence shows that there is no NDA in states like Haryana, Andhra Pradesh, Orissa, Rajasthan and other places.

He added that NDA allies like Janata Dal � United leader Nitish Kumar and AIADMK supreme Jayalalithaa [Images] were keeping their post-poll options open

Gandhi refused to comment on speculations on whether the Congress would prefer to sit in the Opposition rather than forming a fractured government at the Centre. He asserted that the Congress would improve its electoral position, as there had been a positive feeling wherever he had campaigned, and the United Progressive Alliance's allies continued to support the party.

"The sense on the ground is that we are not going to sit in the opposition," he said.

The young Gandhi clearly believes that the party with the largest number of seats has the right to lead the government. He said that if Nationalist Congress Party chief Sharad Pawar [Images] or the Left Front won the highest number of seats, they were welcome to form the government and he would be happy to support them.

It seems that Rahul Gandhi's stamp would be visible on the decisions and policies of the Congress party in the days, months and years ahead. He said he would continue to revive the youth congress and would not take up a ministerial berth unless forced to do so by Dr Singh or his mother.

He has gained in maturity and confidence to take on the entire national media and in the days to come, the nation would see much more of Rahul, who came across as a stubborn yet development-oriented leader. It's a combination Congressmen might find difficult to handle as they learn to live with a new Gandhi on the block.

wished for a lullaby

2009-03-06T22:38:00.000-08:00

sipping down my last wine,
on this dead day,
'cause i lost a fight.
i wiped off my priceless tears,
and looked up and
saw you.

it was the magic of your
steel eyes.
the way you looked at me'
i could've died
and when you
smiled,
i wished for a lullaby.

trip toed i walked
down the frosty lane.
still thinking why not to kiss you
and then
white crystals came down.
and you put your furry jacket on my side.

and we reached
my front steps
i crimsoned away.
while his palm touched my hand
and pulled me close
and kissed me a goodbye.

it was the magic of your
steel eyes.
the way you looked at me'
i could've died
and when you
smiled,
i wished for a lullaby.

sipping down my last wine
on this wonderful night
i keep you with me
till you finish this
lullaby.

Its me v the rest

2009-02-02T06:47:00.000-08:00

I vividly remember that it was because of Mahesh bhupathi that I got hooked into tennis but since he would never reach in formidable ground at international grand slam, my focus changed to international players. And so the first one I got hooked to was andy roddik. I guess it was a wimby final and fedex had beaten him in straight sets. And my heart moved on. Not because andy lost but he absolutely dint show any zeal to win. It was at that time that I became an avid admirer to this Spanish guy…Rafael nadal. People call him through different names rafa being a favourite, but for me it has always been naddy. Its been nice two- three years of being his fan. I could never become a roger fan and there is absolutely no reason for it since he is perhaps one of the greatest players the tennis history has seen. Roger shows the shadow of how tennis is supreme. His fore hand is marvelous. But what is amazing about this guy is his determination to win. Naddy has been working hard and hard. It was, as every body knew impossible to beat him on clay but no one would have ever expected him to grab a wimby title. Ah…what a match it was… unfortunately I was in an idiotic train and I could’nt see it but thanxs to you tube I finally did. I am very emotional towards nadals game. I am fixated and I have to seen all his matches. I think I saw all the US open matches of 2008 but could’nt see the final where naddy lost. I started to believe that it was me…but when my baby became the number one player man I was so proud.
Sadly non in my family supports nadal. And all are for fedex. So im always seen fighting.
I don’t know till when will he be a number one and I honestly hope for a long time to come….but still my heart will always be for - NADDY

rafa wins........

2009-02-01T05:26:00.000-08:00

Rafael Nadal has thwarted Roger Federer’s quest to equal Pete Sampras’ record of 14 Grand Slam singles titles after defeating the Swiss 7-5 3-6 7-6(3) 3-6 6-2 in a breathtaking final of Australian Open 2009 on Sunday night.

Tonight’s match-up was the 19th between the pair and their seventh Grand Slam final, with Nadal now enjoying a 13-6 win-loss against his Swiss rival, including winning their last five meetings. Nadal is now 6-3 in Grand Slam finals, while Federer falls to 13-5, all five of those losses coming to the Spaniard.

In the opening set, Nadal broke Federer in the first game after the Swiss served a double fault and sprayed two backhands, but Federer broke back immediately after a marathon Nadal service game that went to deuce four times, the first two games of the match lasting 15 minutes. Both players soon settled, and the standard of tennis lifted after the early exchanges, continuing to rise as the set progressed.

Federer survived a break point in the fifth game, steadying and sealing his serve with a 180km/h ace, and the No.2 seed jumped to a 4-2 lead after breaking the Spaniard in the next game, sealing it with an enormous forehand on a Nadal second serve. Nadal produced two extraordinary passing shots in the next Federer service game to break back, the Swiss handing it to him with his second double fault of the match on break point. At 5-5, Nadal earned two break points on the Federer serve, needing only one of them to earn a critical break with a driving down-the-line forehand that gave the Spaniard his fourth game in the last five. The No.1 seed then served out the 58-minute set 7-5, making half the number of errors for the set (8-16) and capitalising on all three of his break point chances, Federer managing to convert only two of his four break point opportunities.

Federer started the second set shakily, dropping to 0-30 in his first service game before recovering to go up 1-0 with an ace that he successfully challenged using video line-calling. Nadal averted a minor blip on serve when he crunched a backhand cross-court for 1-1, but Federer earned a break point in the fourth game, Nadal saving it with his first ace of the match and then steadying to level at 2-2. The Spaniard broke in the next game for a 3-2 lead after two untimely forehand errors by the Swiss, his 19th and 20th unforced errors for the match. Nadal then served his first double fault of the match in the sixth game and dumped a forehand meekly into the net to give Federer a break point, which the Spaniard gifted him after a forehand sailed over the baseline to level the scores at 3-3.

Federer’s first serve percentage dropped to 32 per cent for the set in the next game, but he held after a couple of anxious moments for 4-3. Federer then upped the ante in the eighth game by quickly earning two break points, and after Nadal recovered to force deuce, both players squandered numerous chances to win the game before Federer finally converted on a break point chance, his second for the set in seven attempts to leap to a 5-3 lead. The Swiss then comfortably served out the set, which took 48 minutes and saw Federer hit 16 winners to Nadal’s 11 while overcoming Nadal’s 67 per cent accuracy on first serves. The No.2 seed won the final four games of the set.

Nadal went back to the locker-room at the end of the second set, and started the third with a pair of superb curling forehands to take the first game. Federer quickly leveled at 1-1 after a superb overhead. Nadal produced the shot of the match with a spectacular running forehand in the fifth game to take a 3-2 lead, and despite Federer’s first serve percentage hovering dangerously in the low 40s for the set, the Swiss managed to hold for 3-3. Nadal had more unforced errors in the first six games of the third set (nine) than he had in each of the first two sets (eight in each).

Nadal received treatment from the trainer on his right thigh after the seventh game of the set, and was soon under pressure serving at 4-4 when he found himself quickly down 0-30. A Nadal forehand down the line then went wide, but the Spaniard recovered magnificently to save three break points. Federer played an exquisite backhand smash to get the game back to deuce, and a sprayed Federer forehand saw the Spaniard edge to a 5-4 lead. Nadal again sought treatment from the trainer after the ninth game as he tried to stave off the onset of cramp, and held serve in the 11th game after a mighty struggle, Federer failing to capitalise on three break point chances in the game, making him a costly 0-for-6 for the set. With a tiebreak looming, Nadal successfully challenged a line call before an errant Federer backhand handed the Spaniard a set point, the Swiss saving it with a 203km/h serve. Federer then squandered two game points before serving his second ace for the game to force a tiebreak, with the match ticking past three hours. Each player unsuccessfully challenged a call in the first six points of the tiebreaker, which saw the players change ends at 3-3. Nadal then won the next three points, the third of them with a superb running backhand volley, and a Federer double fault handed the Spaniard the set, which lasted 78 minutes. It was the No.2 seed’s only double fault for the set, one where both players made 17 unforced errors and Nadal won 52 points to Federer’s 50. After three sets, Nadal had converted four of his six break point chances, while Federer was just 4-for-17 on opportunities to break the Spaniard’s serve.

Federer held easily to open the fourth set, and had two break points on Nadal’s serve in the very next game, needing just one of them to take a 2-0 lead. A blazing forehand from the Spaniard saw him break back immediately, and after Nadal held for 2-2, the game of the match ensued. It went to deuce seven times, Federer altering his tactics and attempting to run Nadal around with numerous drop shots, and Nadal producing outrageous winners from all angles to stay alive. Federer eventually sealed a 3-2 lead when Nadal couldn’t track down Federer’s fourth drop shot of the game, with the first five games of the fourth set lasting a marathon 31 minutes.

A succession of errors from the Spaniard saw Federer break for a 4-2 advantage, with Nadal starting to appear fatigued, his punishing five-hour victory over Fernando Verdasco in the semifinals perhaps starting to take its toll. Federer held to love in the next game, and soon served out the set 6-3, the fourth frame lasting 45 minutes. Federer was 10-for-14 on net approaches in the set while hitting 15 winners to Nadal’s seven.

The fifth and final set started with Nadal holding easily, and while the Spaniard had Federer under pressure in the next game, he couldn’t capitalise with a break as the match ticked past the four-hour mark. He didn’t miss the opportunity to break Federer in his next service game, the Swiss relinquishing a 30-0 lead with a torrent of unforced errors to give Nadal a 3-1 lead. The Spaniard then held for 4-1, Federer’s unforced error count for the set ballooning to nine. The Swiss held to love in the next game, and in the crucial seventh game of the set, Nadal held his nerve, holding to love. With Federer serving to stay in the match, a double-fault handed Nadal a 0-30 lead, and a sprayed forehand handed the Spaniard two match points, the second of which Federer saved after a nail-biting rally that saw Nadal push a sliced backhand wide. Nadal then secured another match point, winning the title after Federer pushed a forehand long after four hours and 22 minutes.

When a Woman Loves a Man

2009-01-31T11:19:00.000-08:00

by David Lehman

When she says margarita she means daiquiri.
When she says quixotic she means mercurial.
And when she says, "I'll never speak to you again,"
she means, "Put your arms around me from behind
as I stand disconsolate at the window."

He's supposed to know that.

When a man loves a woman he is in New York and she is in Virginia
or he is in Boston, writing, and she is in New York, reading,
or she is wearing a sweater and sunglasses in Balboa Park and he
is raking leaves in Ithaca
or he is driving to East Hampton and she is standing disconsolate
at the window overlooking the bay
where a regatta of many-colored sails is going on
while he is stuck in traffic on the Long Island Expressway.

When a woman loves a man it is one ten in the morning
she is asleep he is watching the ball scores and eating pretzels
drinking lemonade
and two hours later he wakes up and staggers into bed
where she remains asleep and very warm.

When she says tomorrow she means in three or four weeks.
When she says, "We're talking about me now,"
he stops talking. Her best friend comes over and says,
"Did somebody die?"

When a woman loves a man, they have gone
to swim naked in the stream
on a glorious July day
with the sound of the waterfall like a chuckle
of water rushing over smooth rocks,
and there is nothing alien in the universe.

Ripe apples fall about them.
What else can they do but eat?

When he says, "Ours is a transitional era,"
"that's very original of you," she replies,
dry as the martini he is sipping.

They fight all the time
It's fun
What do I owe you?
Let's start with an apology
Ok, I'm sorry, you dickhead.
A sign is held up saying "Laughter."
It's a silent picture.
"I've been fucked without a kiss," she says,
"and you can quote me on that,"
which sounds great in an English accent.

One year they broke up seven times and threatened to do it
another nine times.

When a woman loves a man, she wants him to meet her at the
airport in a foreign country with a jeep.
When a man loves a woman he's there. He doesn't complain that
she's two hours late
and there's nothing in the refrigerator.

When a woman loves a man, she wants to stay awake.
She's like a child crying
at nightfall because she didn't want the day to end.

When a man loves a woman, he watches her sleep, thinking:
as midnight to the moon is sleep to the beloved.
A thousand fireflies wink at him.
The frogs sound like the string section
of the orchestra warming up.
The stars dangle down like earrings the shape of grapes.

2009-01-17T00:58:00.001-08:00

Love is a many splendid thing. Love lifts us up where we belong. All you need is love!
~ from the movie Moulin Rouge ~

movies. book and being lethargic

2009-01-17T00:24:00.000-08:00

well my exams are round the corner and i am not studying. nothing new. but the thing is i want to study and i cant. well one of the factors being that its cold in here and i have a tendency of becoming extremely lethargic in winters and that's y i cant stand this season. anyways.
i read a book by meg cabot called every boys got one. well the book was good. it really pasteurised what a women really wants and what she really is. i believe wen a guy asks a question to a girl 'what do u want?' he should read the book. he would understand. of late i saw a lot of movies. and notebook happens to be a favourite. it was good. maybe since i am partial towards romantic movies. but the screenplay was great and even the lead actor. whos name i have clearly forgot. then i saw twilight. i was a little disappointed since i expected a lot out of the movie. the seemed to wrap up the movie as fast as they could. but robert pattinson was yummy vampire. i'd fall for a vampire as sexy as him. then came American beauty. i dint like the movie. strangely it won academy award for best film......anywaise....golden globes happened, and to my delite (except the slumdog win) kate winslet won. i was rooting for her even when i have'nt seen the revolutionary road' which btw is next in my list. sharukh was amazing and for a change id say he looked really handsome.
chandini chawk has released and much to my happiness it has been getting bad reviews and i hope it bombs. not because of akshy( he is good)...but because of a certain miss i have ranbir kapoor.....oh how i wish she gives one flop after the other,,,,,,,,
and star screen awards happened.....i was fine with the awards given but best new comer went to farhan and rajeev.....clearly disappointing....hopefully filmfare would correct that. as it is award function are big time losers....
australian open is gearing up and i hope nadal clinches the title.....
so i guess this much of all is enough.....not to forget i saw rab ne......i got a head ache...aditya chopra dont make us start hating DDLJ.......
and yes jonas brothers might get a Grammy....hope so

Noah: I am nothing special; just a common man with common thoughts, and I've led a common life. There are no monuments dedicated to me and my name will soon be forgotten. But in one respect I have succeeded as gloriously as anyone who's ever lived: I've loved another with all my heart and soul; and to me, this has always been enough.

y i hate deepika padukode

2009-01-14T04:58:00.000-08:00

i hate her...really...especially wenshe is standing wid the man of my dreams...agh...but my hatred towars is not consentrated on the fact that she is ranbir's gf. but how much she is hypd by the media. she has no talent and she gets the debut award. y? just because her film was a huge hit? soman is perhaps more beautiful and talentd that this arrogant. she plays wid a man's heart like a toy. look wt she did wid yuvraj is liable for abuses. and then madam goes on saying their was nothing....ya rite? any body buying that.....
she is not only arrogant she has no respect for other ppl. and if ranbir marries her it would be a big mistake

libra n 2009

2009-01-08T06:28:00.000-08:00

Focus on inner growth

LIBRA
September 24 to October 23

Mantra of the year: Work on yourself from the inside out.

The year 2009 for the articulate and artistic Libran is one of soul searching and finding who they are. Librans are blessed with a happy, sunny spirit which they counter with their constant worrying about small matters. Librans are also gifted, gentle, persevering folks and believe in getting to their goals slow and steady. When challenged, they can show their controlling streak, however their way of viewing and making the best of every given situation is an art they use to the best of their ability. This year, all their creative thinking comes to their rescue as January sees the need for maximum strategy and execution techniques. Your resolution will be to be more calm and cool. You also need to focus on your inner growth rather than looking at the world outside.

Changes of all kinds are on the cards - be it relocation, a new project or a new home! The moves will also make you learn lessons from difficult situations and teach you how to challenge people in your professional life. It's vital for you to be honest with yourself for sustained success. Staying away from shortcuts and manipulations will help you progress and achieve your goals by August. Some of you may add more members to your team in order to expand your ideals and ideas. If connected with art and craft, you spend quality time on design and methods of advertising to give your best to the product.

Finances
Money owed to you returns in September, giving you the spending power to choose and enjoy. Purchasing and decorating a new home/office space in the winter months is indicated especially as the market conditions improve. For businessmen and lawyers, this year seminars and conferences prove to be fulfilling as you meet many a like-minded folk and exchange/work on good ideas that head towards common goals.

Romance
This year, you will connect with family and friends dispassionately. You give and share with your loved ones without expecting any in return. And that, by mid-year, will translate into balanced relationships at home. Travel over the weekends visiting friends is fun and frolic as your circle of love grows. Those single will enjoy happy dating and be at their flirtatious best.

Health
This year, health will remain good. You will need to watch out for minor accidents and soothe your nervous nature with walks, fresh foods and a lot of quality sleep. You will need to take care of your back and get a good massage every once in a while to wipe your stress lines away.

Lucky colour: Wear silver for hope
Lucky stone: Cat's eye
Lucky day: Sunday
Famous Librans: Ranbir Kapoor, Amitabh Bachchan

***

Ganesha Speaks

Career
Lucky year for fiscal gains through your career, but hardships or hard work may also be there. You might have to keep putting in more and more effort at the office. You may also receive due appreciation, but you may still feel bit dissatisfied with the position and power that you possess. This is the right time to go for further studies in order to build your career. If you wish to move out of your current job, please think twice as nothing worthwhile would come across your way during the first three quarters of the year.

Relationships
You will be at ease with your beloved or life partner in this year. New dimensions at the love front will lead the relationship to the next level of understanding and your love for your beloved or spouse may become more intense. This year you are likely to enjoy a passionate time together. Ganesha feels that this is the right year to think about marriage and go ahead positively, if you are single and looking.

Favourable dates for love, sexual matters, weddings
September 23 to October 22
January 20 to February 18
March 21 to April 19

Favourable time for travelling
February 15 to March 7
June 15 to 30

Favourable time for education and related matters
May 17 to August 5
August 26 to September 6

Caption: Librans are also gifted, gentle, persevering folks and believe in getting to their goals slow and steady. But they -- Ranbir Kapoor too -- always make the best of a situation.

yestersay

2009-01-03T23:36:00.000-08:00

i know i said no more depressive poem but i couldn't help it...i had to.....

it seems yesterday
when you kissed me.
it seems yesterday
when you
told me that
you love me.
it seems yesterday
that you walked away
never to come back again.

cause i know
you love her.
you never loved me.
cause i know
you miss her.
you never missed me.
but every tears i dropped
were just for you...
it seems yesterday.

when i'd be on my deathbed
promise me you wont come
near me.
you are my locked
past
understand.
who always made my
heart bleed.
it seems yesterday

since two years
I've wasted my life
in the hope
that you would come back.
but when i know
you kiss her passionately
every day
i die every passing second
thinking of it.......

cause i know
you love her.
you never loved me.
cause i know
you miss her.
you never missed me.
but every tears i dropped
were just for you...
it seems yesterday.

it seems yesterday
when you kissed me.
it seems yesterday
when you
told me that
you love me.
it seems yesterday
that you walked away
never to come back again.

it seems yesterday....

new years

2009-01-01T00:53:00.001-08:00

happy new years to all......i hope that not only does this year is terror free for us but also the problem of recession is sorted......at the stroke of midnight i promised myself to start my life all over again. to lead my life my way. to move on from my past and to bury my emotional baggage. so i told a truth to someone and i am relieved .i dont care what that person thinks of me now but i am free of leading my life with a secret in my heart.i hope to do good work this year, study hard and be happy........and perhaps find a someone......who knows...?

burried finally

2008-12-11T02:13:00.000-08:00

i have had very enlightening days so far. one of it being that what i actually want. for that i had to bury my past in such debris that it should'nt come back to haunt me. i have decided in my mind to do it finally. it is relieving. i have found a friend back. life is looking good. so no more depressive love poetries. pheonix rises from the ashes.

baby, i love you

2008-12-06T02:23:00.000-08:00

I know.
I so know.
That you have burnt away
All my memories.
Listen
To me
For a second

That baby I love you.
Would always love you.
Love you in my dreams.
Baby,
Call me again…
Please.

Shout,
My desperation is shouting
At you.
Bleeds. My heart is bleeding
For your one touch.
What am I suppose
To tell
To my soul
That is screaming

That baby I love you.
Would always love you.
Love you in my dreams.
Baby,
Call me again…
Please.

Shala la la la
Sha la la la…
Sitting alone in this corner,
I just want to know
What did I do?
I just want to know…
Are you blind?
To see the teary eyes
Which shouts

That baby I love you.
Would always love you.
Love you in my dreams.
Baby,
Call me again…
Please

No. I am not gonna beg you.
No. I am neither waiting for you.
I just want you to listen to me…
Foe the one last time…

That baby
I love you.
Would always
Love you.
Love you in my dreams.
Baby.
I love you.

enough is enough

2008-12-03T23:07:00.000-08:00

its been now over a week to the unfortunate day of any Indian life. a lot of things have happened. politicians have resigned made comments, and what not. every one is angry. every one has had enough. for how long will we live like this. but the problem is. have these politicians ever listened to us. have they actually ever cared, what a common man goes through. i wish if we could round these inhuman creatures and end them up. barbaric? i dint think so. its just. have these men in black, the soldiers come into this profession just to die. i dont think so. we dont need a better set of politicians we need to revamp the constitution. we need the politician to know that they are bloody responsible to all this. that we need to be asked, our views every thing. what great work have they done to get such a beefed up security.
they just can see one thing a chair. that is just what they want. power can make a man blind. but blindness to such extent is not welcomed. we, the people have been taken for granted. people are on the streets, asking one thing- what is our fault. have we now, when go to a restaurant, or mall, airport railway station, go with a feeling that we might not come back?
if the terrorist wanted to instill fear in us, listen one thing. U HAVE FAILED. we are strong. we will never divide. we are Indians. we are human and humanity is the most enriching religion.
i am not a girl. i am not even a Hindu. i am an Indian. that is my identity. and i am proud of it.
its time. the days of gandhigiri will not work with these inhuman terrorist. if u eliminate one, we would eliminate 5. its unfortunate that in the name of religion what all these young people are made to do. films like khuda ke liye have shown how young minds are brain washed.
its about time to change. to change ourselves. dont even need to vote, its like choosing between lunatics. would be like to be governed by lunatics? i dont think so.
it time to rise.
its time to say- ENOUGH IS ENOUGH.....

i am i kid after all

2008-12-03T21:00:00.000-08:00

I always dreamt of quite streets.
A peaceful sky,
With birds fluttering
All around
I dreamt of walking
Carelessly
With always affection
In a strangers eye.

I hoped to not know
What fear means.
I prayed never to see
Death through a third eye.

I am young
I am feeble.
I am a kid after all
But I am strong
No masked fellow
Would deprive this honour
From me.

You could come a million times.
Rob away my smile
But you could not rob away
From me
my will.
My freedom.
My fight towards unifying
My countrymen.

You might come
Thinking to divide us.
People like you are demons
In a human disguise.
Humans don’t do things
Which you do.

Humans don’t kill
In the name of god.
No god can be happy
With you eliminating
His own very creations.

When will you realize.
When will we
Open our very own eyes.
How long will we question
The men in white?
Or be happy with the green ?
Its time to stop questioning
Its time to rise.
Its time to rise against this
Masked tides.

How many more
Kids like me
Loose their smiles?
Or themselves
before they could even learn
How to write.

Is peace just a mere
word?
Will I see more of death?
Will I have to always scrub the red blood?
Is this the way we all
Have to tread.

When would this end?
The loss cant be repaired.
How many more of Mumbai.
Delhi, jaipur…
Would I have to see?

I always dreamt of quite streets.
A peaceful sky,
With birds fluttering
All around
I dreamt of walking
Carelessly
With always affection
In a strangers eye.

I hoped to not know
What fear means.
I prayed never to see
Death through a third eye.

I am young
I am feeble.
I am a kid after all
But I am strong
No masked fellow
Would deprive this honour
From me.

mumbai blasts

2008-11-26T21:31:00.000-08:00

i am in extreme pain and shock right now while i am writting this. the terrorists attacked mumbai yet again killing almost 100 people. i got to know about it today morning. my family as well as a frnd reside there. but my concern was not them as i got to know early that they are all alright. i am in pain since these 100 people are died and i dont know how many more. till whem will this go. youth are now terrorist? how can they sleep peacefully after killing so many people.

10:30 AM: The number of policemen killed has gone up to 16. Prime Minister Manmohan Singh [Images] will address the nation after 7 PM after the Cabinet meeting. The Maharashtra state Cabinet will meet at 2 PM.

09:30 AM: Terrorist out in the open! A terrorist holed up inside Nariman House jumps to the adjacent building. Meanwhile, an emergency Cabinet meeting has been called at 1100 hours.

09:27 AM: IB has arrested a Lashkar-e-Tayiba terrorist of Pakistani origin from Mumbai. The e-mail sent after terror attacks has been traced to Russia [Images]. Authorities say the mail was sent by Lashkar operatives. They also believe that the Lashkar terrorists came directly from Karachi to Mumbai.

09:30 AM: Firing has been heard near Nariman House in Colaba. Police have cordoned off the area amid reports that terrorists are holed up in the building.

09:09 AM: Curfew has been clamped in Colaba after firing intensified in the Taj hotel. Police are using smoke cannisters to disable terrorists' vision. Meanwhile, Hostages are being evacuated from the Taj hotel even as gunbattle rages. A journalist has been injured in the firing. All international flights from Mumbai have been cancelled.

08:55 AM: Agencies have reported that terrorists are holed up inside the Cama Hospital. Commandoes have started firing at terrorists.

08:05 AM: Fresh firing erupted early on Thursday in Taj hotel as commandos moved in to flush out terrorists holding some foreigners hostage.

Sharp shooters of army, NSG and other security forces moved into Mumbai's landmark hotel. Police believe that the number of holed out terrorists could be three or four.

Another luxury hotel Trident (formerly Oberoi) was under siege with some terrorists holding some foreigners hostage.

07:50 AM: More grim news is coming in from Taj Hotel, where several staff members have been feared killed in the terrorist attack.

Over 100 guests are still stuck inside the hotel, where two terrorists are reportedly holed up.

At Nariman House in Colaba, onlookers informed that the police exchanged fire about an hour ago.

The place looked like a riot-hit site, swarming with police officials and military trucks. Most people have been holed up here since an explosion shook the area at 10.30 pm.

The explosion occurred when the terrorists lobbed hand grenades at the local petrol pump. The blast was followed by a gunfight between police forces and the terrorists.

Taj burns

06:20 AM: The hostage crisis continued at Taj Hotel in the wee hours of Thursday as Army commandos moved in to flush out the terrorists.

Meanwhile, Maharashtra Chief Minister Vilasrao Deshmukh assured that there was no hostage situation at Cama Hospital in South Mumbai.

An Army commando was reportedly injured in the shoot-out. An explosion was also reported in the lobby of the Taj Hotel

04: 23 AM: Vaihayasi Pande-Daniel reports that the fire that engulfed the old wing of the Taj Mahal [Images] Hotel in Mumbai has been put out. Though the major conflagration has been contained, flames continue to flicker, occasionally leaping into life, at the corner of the heritage wing.

Police and fire brigade personnel have placed ladders against the side of the building, and are bringing hotel guests out through that means. Some foreigners who had been evacuated were being ferried to a nearby hospital for first aid, while others are being taken by bus to alternate accommodations. Officials here estimate that most of the guests inside the hotel have been evacuated.

Video 2

Commandos of the Indian navy meanwhile have staked out vantage points covering all exit points, while others of their number prowl around the perimeter of the hotel.

A group of Taj employees stood clustered on the pavement opposite the hotel, staring at the hotel through tear-filled eyes. They had been told to leave, they said � but clearly, they could not bring themselves to walk away from a hotel that, to them and to most Mumbaikars, is shared heritage than mere hotel.

Elsewhere, an attractive young woman attempted to restore some semblance of order to her silver-zari sari. She was drenched, and still disoriented from her experiences of the night.

"We were partying, and suddenly there was firing all over," the woman, who had just been evacuated by ladder from a window some 30 feet up, recalled. "I'd read about such things in the paper, and routinely turned the page� but when it happens to you, when you experience it�"

03: 57 AM: Though the firefight at the Oberoi is still far from finished, the takeover of the operation by units of the Indian Army [Images] appears to have taken the South Mumbai hotel off the 'critical' list.

Vaihayasi Pande-Daniel reports for Rediff that most of the one dozen fire trucks that had been stationed around the Oberoi have been dispatched to the Taj Mahal Hotel, where a blazing fire threatens to devastate the old wing of the iconic hotel.
Daniel cites police sources as saying the army commandoes are doing a systematic sweep of the hotel, lobbing grenades ahead of them to take out hidden dangers before securing each successive wing of the hotel.

The constant bang of grenades from within the hotel continues to alarm the crowds gathered outside the hotel, and kept at a distance by police. Not all of them have come to gape, however. Vadhavan, a businessman from New Delhi [Images], sits in rumpled attire on the parapet of Marine Drive, trying to stay awake.

He had arrived in Mumbai this evening at the head of a 13-member business delegation. He was in the act of checking into the Oberoi when the firing began. "I think the shooting started at the Oberoi," says Vadhavan. "They ushered us all out through a side entrance and told us to leave. I got separated from the rest of my group; I think they are waiting on the other side of the hotel."

The flushing out operation is far from finished; Vadhavan's wait threatens to extend through what remains of this night.

3:42 AM: At the Taj Hotel, where a joint operation involving the Mumbai police, the Central Reserve Police Force and a commando group from the Navy is engaged in flushing out terrorists within the premises, PTI reports that almost all the guests have been brought out to safety at the time of writing this.

The situation continues to remain dangerous, however, with an indeterminate number of terrorists within the hotel, two of whom are believed to be holding a group of tourists hostage on an upper floor.

Meanwhile, the fire that erupted in the old wing of the historic hotel has spread alarmingly. The fire now burns bright across at least two mid-level floors of the old wing, and thick clouds of black smoke spew from the signature minaret that crowns the hotel's roof.

03: 06 AM: A little over four hours since gunshots first erupted at the CST railway terminal, and coordinated terrorist attacks spread to various parts of South Bombay, the situation remains fluid.

At the Taj Mahal Hotel, a contingent of Navy commandos has joined the police and Central Reserve Police Force personnel attempting to enter the hotel and flush out the terrorists. From within the hotel, word is that occasional explosions, and sporadic gunfire, continue at the time of writing this.

At the Oberoi Hotel, the army has taken over the operation and entered the hotel; it is now reportedly engaged in flushing out the terrorists hiding within.

At the Cama Hospital, a specialty medical center for women and children, official sources say terrorists are holed up on the fourth floor and have been firing from that vantage point. Police have surrounded the hospital and are engaging the terrorists in an ongoing gun battle.

02:50 AM: Communist Party of India-Marxist leader and Member of Parliament N N Krishnadas, who is staying at the Taj Mahal Hotel, reports that as late as 2:10 AM, explosions could be heard from within the premises.

Krishnadas told CNN that he is holed up in a room, and outside of the noise of explosions and gunfire has no real idea what is happening within the premises.

Meanwhile, the fire that broke out in one of the hotel's middle floors has been spreading upwards, adding a fresh hazard both to the police and CRPF personnel engaged in the anti-terrorist operation and to the guests within the hotel.

Even as police sources upped the toll in today's terrorist strikes in Mumbai at 80 and counting, police continue to lay siege to the Taj Mahal Hotel, where two terrorists are believed to be holding at least 15 guests hostage on one of the upper floors of the hotel.

The police are at this point in time unsure whether the two hostage takers are the only terrorists within the hotel.
Meanwhile, the Indian Army has moved into the Oberoi and the Trident, the two other South Mumbai hotels targeted in today's terrorist strikes.

A battalion of the Indian army entered the Oberoi and began an operation against the terrorists holed up inside. The army was called in after the police took several casualties, including the deaths of some senior officers.

With the army now in charge of this phase of the operation � the first time the Indian army is operating in the city since the 1992 riots � the police has fallen back and is focusing on cordoning off the area.

Vaihayasi Pande-Daniel, reporting for Rediff.com from outside the Oberoi Hotel, reports that with the cordon being drawn tight, people waiting outside are in a state of panic, and desperately searching for information. A group of senior bankers from Hyderabad are among those inside the hotel to attend a conference; their Mumbai-based colleagues are outside, awaiting word of their fate.

02: 25 AM: Mumbai's Anti-Terrorist Squad chief Hemant Karkare died of bullet wounds in the ongoing battle against armed terrorists that is raging across several parts of South Mumbai.

Vijay Salaskar, an officer attached to the Mumbai police who has been famed as an 'encounter specialist', was seriously injured in the ongoing gun battle and has been rushed to hospital. In all, seven Mumbai policemen are believed killed thus far.

Meanwhile, Railway Police Chief Ashok Sharma told Rediff.com that at least 40 people were killed inside Mumbai's nodal Chatrapathi Sivaji Terminus. "The attack started around 9.35 pm," Sharma said. "Two terrorists were inside. We can confirm at least 40 people killed."

It is yet unclear whether the terrorists are still on-site, have left, or been killed. Sharma said there had been no firing from within the terminus for the last two hours. "Despite this, we are not allowing people to go into the station as we are worried that the terrorists might have planted bombs or left live grenades in the station," he said.

Sharma said the official belief is that the two terrorists had sneaked out of the station in the confusion following the original assault.

Sudhir Dalvi, a sub-inspector attached to the Mumbai cell of the Anti-Terrorist Squad, told Sheela Bhatt for Rediff.com that his boss, ATS chief Hemant Karkare, and senior police officers Vijay Salaskar and Additional Commissioner of Police Ashok Kamte, were killed in an incident outside Mumbai's Cama Hospital.

"Our chief Karkare, my senior officer Salaskar and ACP Kamte died while engaging terrorists outside the Cama hospital," a sobbing Dalvi told Rediff.com. "All of a sudden, terrorists threw grenades at Karkare leading to chaos. We are unable to confirm whether they fell to terrorist fire or were killed by the grenades."

Meanwhile, the army has moved into the Trident Hotel, the third five-star hotel in the South Mumbai region that had been targeted in tonight's coordinated terrorist strikes.

pray for the departed souls.....and lets pledge to be united at this difficult time. its not about killing mumbaikars. its about india

02:10 AM: It is now believed that 15 people, at least seven of them foreigners, have been taken hostage by two terrorists and are being held on the roof of the Taj Mahal Hotel.

Rakesh Patel, a London-based businessman who managed to escape, told NDTV that the two terrorists, estimated to be in their early 20s, came to a restaurant on the ground floor of the Taj, rounded up the hostages and took them to the 18th floor. Patel, who was one among them, managed at that point to escape.

Patel said the terrorists asked if any of the hostages were carrying American or British passports, and said he got the clear impression that they wanted foreigners.

01:50 AM: Krishnakumar reports from the Juhu region that a bomb went off in a taxi that was speeding along the Western Express Highway from Vile Parle towards Andheri, killing two people and injuring two others.

"The taxi exploded and went up in flames as it sped past the traffic island under the flyover at the domestic airport," an eyewitness said on phone. "The vehicle, which was up in flames soon after it crossed the traffic signal, was on the left
side. A bystander and a person in the taxi were killed.

Reports indicate that this was perhaps the night's highest-intensity blast. Krishnakumar reports that the taxi's doors were found a distance of 50 meters or more away, and body parts of the victims had been thrown even further.

01:43 AM: At least two suspected terroristswere shot dead minutes earlier at the corner of Mumbai's Chowpatty. Rediff's Vaihayasi Pande-Daniel, who is on the site, reports that the area has been cordoned off and is swarming with police officers; the Skoda is under guard and a cellphone, a jacket, and items of footwear are strewn around the vehicle.

Meanwhile at the Taj Mahal Hotel, the standoff between police, who have surrounded the hotel, and terrorists who are holed up inside, continues.

A short while ago, power went off in parts of the hotel, adding to the sense of panic and fear. Well known food critic Sabina Sahgal Saikia, who is inside the hotel, told NDTV on phone just now that the guests are terrified, and unaware of just what is happening around them. It is unclear at this point in time whether the power has been turned off by the police as they battle the terrorists.

01:27 AM: Rediff's Vaihayasi Pande Daniel calls in from the Marine Drive region to report that the approaches to the South Mumbai area have been shut down, and that sounds of firing are audible as far away as Mumbai's famed Queen's Necklace stretch, though the source of the firing is unclear.

Meanwhile, a foreign national who managed to escape from the Taj Mahal Hotel, where a state of seige currently exists, told NDTV that armed and masked gunmen were wandering around inside the hotel, looking for people with American or British passports.

The eyewitness account appears to confirm the growing belief among law enforcement circles that this latest attack is aimed directly at foreign nationals -- hence the choice of star hotels as prime targets. They further theorize that automatic weapons are being used rather than bombs in order to orchestrate such targeted mayhem.

Meanwhile, the real dangers of the situation are being exaggerated by a proliferation of rumors. One such that has been aired on a few channels including CNN suggested that firing was taking place at the JW Marriott, another five star hotel in the Juhu region of suburban Mumbai. A source in the hotel however confirmed to Rediff just now that there was no alarm at the hotel, and no incident of any kind had taken place.

12:44 AM: A gun battle is ongoing in the Taj Hotel in Colaba. Within the last ten minutes, a guest at the hotel got word out to CNN via email that a grenade had exploded within the hotel premises just then.

Additional Commissioner of Police AN Roy and other officials confirmed that some armed terrorists are holed up in the iconic hotel.

Police officials said they have no information of a hostage situation; they say guests have been sequestered in safe areas of the hotel, and the police are now engaged in flushing out the terrorists from their hiding place.

frosty december night

2008-11-23T23:07:00.000-08:00

I am alone in our room,
Which is full of
Your memories.
The crumbled bed.
The unpolished shoe.
Even the half wrapped gift,
You bought for me.
Nobody to wrap it again for me
As you are gone.

It was the frosty December night,
That I lost you.
It was the night that I hate the most.
Why did you have to pick me up?
It was the frosty December night,
That I lost you.

You are still near to me
Yet so far.
I can still smell your existence
But can’t feel your glance.
Three winters back
When I met you.
Three moon back,
When you were gone.

My life has no meaning without you.
My eyes won’t see another face.
No one will ever come again
So near to me.
It was always just you.
It will always be…
Just you.

I look at the dried roses,
Which filled up the room.
And I walk to open the present you,
bought.
It was a stone.
A sparkly one.
You were going to propose.
(I shake.
The tears jerk away after three days.)

It was the frosty December night,
That I lost you.
It was the night that I hate the most.
Why did you have to pick me up?
It was the frosty December night,
That I lost you.
I love you…

you are mine

2008-11-12T09:00:00.000-08:00

Resting down with you
On the green emeralds
With daisy’s all around us
Reliving the time when you were gone
It was then my love got born.
Your touch, which I missed
You eclipsed it with your kiss.
Wiping the tears which escaped
My eyes
…You are mine…

I waited for this moment
In every dream I saw.
Dancing to the lullaby tune
In an enchanted shore.
Your disappearance was like
A night which is not starry.
You absence
My repentance
Came and go…
Like friends and foe

People told me not to cry
But I decided to fight
My fate
Till it dried.
The empty cages of my heart,
Craved for you
No matter what I do
It always echoed your name.
And it was not lame,
I didn’t know who to blame.

One sultry evening
When the sun was resting in
You came into my arms
Like a honeyed nectar.
To feel complete
Loneliness depletes.
Nothing changed
And I remained
In your strong frame.

Resting down with you
On the green emeralds
With daisy’s all around us
Reliving the time when you were gone
It was then my love got born.
Your touch, which I missed
You eclipsed it with your kiss.
Wiping the tears which escaped
My eyes
…You are mine…

my romeo

2008-11-10T22:55:00.000-08:00

Sitting in the green meadows
Thinking about the dreams
That comes and goes
I was Juliet draped in pink
And you were….
My Romeo……

Hey, hello…listen to me
Hey, hello…please see me…
I want to be the one
With whom you could love
Hey, hello my Romeo…

In between the allies
You would come
But not see me…
I would always try
To stand on your side.
But you would always pass by

Hey, hello…listen to me
Hey, hello…please see me…
I want to be the one
With whom you could love
Hey, hello my Romeo…

With a determined will
I decide to tell you
That I want to be your Juliet.
But…
I see you with someone else…
You were someone else’s Romeo

Hey, hello…listen to me
Hey, hello…please see me…
I want to be the one
With whom you could love
Hey, hello my Romeo…

Sitting in the green meadows
Thinking about the dreams
That comes and goes
I was Juliet draped in pink
And you were….
My Romeo……

i'll miss you dada

2008-11-10T22:04:00.000-08:00

It has been quite an eventful week...but i would always remember it as it was im this week that my saurabh went away....i have fond memories of him. it was in 1999 that i first saw him...he was playing at lords and was smashing for cricket. not only did i fell for this Bengali but also the game which has kept me engrossed. gangu as i love to call him is someone for whom i become significantly emotional. I've cheered when he would give some memorable knock and cry when he wont. my addiction towards this game is too much and it is because of him.
when he became the captain for the first time, it was a match against Australia..and we won....
but it was during his bad days that i came in complete support of him. fought with friends because of him and well with my father as well....my love for this fellow was purely because of the magnitude of the game. people talk about MSD's sixes but when saurabh used to hit, it would be out of the stadium....aah...those days...
when my sis called me and told me his plans for retirement...i could not speak. i was shocked. i always wanted to see him play from a stadium...unfortunate it is that it would not happen.....
but i will always remember this fearless man, his never say die attitude, the way he used to captain.....that time when we won the natwest series...the shirt one.....or that emotional pepsi add.......
i cannot write how much i would miss him....dada.....i'll miss you too much

taylor swifts....song

2008-11-10T21:54:00.000-08:00

"Teardrops On My Guitar"- taylor swift

Drew looks at me, I fake a smile so he won't see
That I want and I'm needing everything that we should be
I'll bet she's beautiful, that girl he talks about
And she's got everything that I have to live without

Drew talks to me, I laugh cause it's just so funny
That I can't even see anyone when he's with me
He says he's so in love, he's finally got it right,
I wonder if he knows he's all I think about at night

[Chorus:]

He's the reason for the teardrops on my guitar
The only thing that keeps me wishing on a wishing star
He's the song in the car I keep singing, don't know why I do

Drew walks by me, can he tell that I can't breathe?
And there he goes, so perfectly,
The kind of flawless I wish I could be
She'd better hold him tight, give him all her love
Look in those beautiful eyes and know she's lucky cause

[Repeat Chorus]

So I drive home alone, as I turn out the light
I'll put his picture down and maybe
Get some sleep tonight

He's the reason for the teardrops on my guitar
The only one who's got enough of me to break my heart
He's the song in the car I keep singing, don't know why I do
He's the time taken up, but there's never enough
And he's all that I need to fall into..

Drew looks at me, I fake a smile so he won't see.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

the song is so perfect. every word has a deep meaning in it

happy birthday to me

2008-10-14T01:23:00.000-07:00

yesterday i turned a year old.....and i really had a nice birthday.....some unexpected ppl remembered my birthday and it was just so sweet of him to remember it....then my lovely frnd ohe buki called.....her calls are always so special......i went, as always to a sai mandir and then went to a guy so that he could disinfect my lappy....moron was asking a hefty price so i just ran away from the shop.....lol...later i went on a promised bike ride and then to mc'd favourite thing on earth.....my frnds threw a surprise cake cutting ceremony.....
on 19Th planning for a big Chinese party....and a speciality would be Singaporean noodles for ohe buki..........

boys are stupid

2008-10-13T00:56:00.000-07:00

Meredith: You should take something.
Cristina: Drugs are for babies.
Izzie: I hate Alex.
Cristina: And the non sequitur award goes to...
Izzie: I’m sorry, but I hate Alex.
Meredith: I broke up with Derek.
Cristina: Burke wants to have a relationship.
Izzie: Boys are stupid.
Cristina: Yep.

Boys are stupid--- a fact people .It’s something guy’s need to accept. Well they are stupid. They don’t understand hints; they sometimes get mean when you try to be very caring….

The word ‘chipku’ comes out… and they say wrong things at the wrong time.

They are not even sensitive…well sometimes they are but most of the times they…you put words in their mouth actually. Morons.

You become a caring friend they would question that,

You give them space they question that as well…

In a relationship you ask for a break for a little while and they are on your nerves…

You say sorry and they behave like… an ass…

You smile as a friend they ask you out

You refuse and they go on bitching about you…

Sometimes stupidity is so much that they can’t see the difference between something abstract and something real. How difficult is it to see that.
How difficult is to accept your faults…
How difficult is to accept an apology and mend things….but no they won’t. That when the whole male ego crap shoots out… idiots… as if we don’t have it. So when we start showing it we are termed as girls having some attitude.

Not all guys are stupid. Exceptions are there. Although I haven’t met any till now who haven’t shown the boyish stupidity…

Brothers:: well they are stupid as well…they irritate the hell out of you…they never stop irritating you… and man if you scream at them, then you become my not so favorites sis…and baba rakhi ke din…kya attitude mae rehte hai…non sense.
Major guys have the commitment issues. They run away the time you whisper marriage. Live in is what they desire. Are we living in US or something?

The formula to identify this syndrome:

Don’t say right things at the right time + lethargic
---------------------------------------------------------- = stupidity
Ego+ rash mind+ never take what ‘we’ say

Hence proved

lethargiccccccccccccc

2008-10-11T00:29:00.000-07:00

winters have crert in and as all my near dear and loved onse knows.......its time for hibernation.....so now i'd be sleeping all the time and stop thinking all the crap.....i have'nt started studying yet....3rd year is turning out to ne hell........my b'day in 2 day and i hope i aint lethargic on that day.....and confession i have lefted other imposed ban on non veg after two years...had chilen tikka...it did hurt a bit inntionally, but y to bother.past has to b locked forcefully as it does effect your present....latter the taste went on well...but i did feel guilty abt it...for just a min.....2 years idioticallyi tried and well nothing..........this is for ohe buke....im expecting a call from singpore on 13th babe.........kidding

pick me. choose me . love me.

2008-10-07T00:09:00.000-07:00

Meredith: I lied. I'm not...out...of this relationship. I'm in. I'm so in, it's humiliating, because here I am, begging--
Derek: Mere--
Meredith: Just...shut up. You say Meredith and I yell, remember?
Derek: Yeah.
Meredith: OK, Here it is. Your choice, it's simple. Her or me. And I'm sure she's really great. But Derek...I love you. In a really, really big...pretend to like your taste in music... let you eat the last piece of cheesecake... hold a radio over my head outside your bedroom window... unfortunate way that makes me hate you...love you. So pick me. Choose me. Love me.

So funny question…does love really makes us beg? Hmm what would I do? Funny question again….self respect is so important for majority of people actually; I am not an exception to it at all. I can never do or act something which could be against my self respect…but love makes you do stupid stuff…
Now dats a fact that every one knows ;-)
So coming back, possibilities of saying stuff, what Meredith says to Derek, in my case….
Maybe…
It’s very hypothetical actually what if there is someone whom I love a lot, so much that I feel he is the one. The one…I guess I would be chanting the same lines… no matter what happens; no matter if he tells me to get lost…but it would be like the one last chance being honest to him, one last chance to let out all your desperation…last chance to tell ‘I know there will or is a women in your life but no one can love you the way I have.’
Desperate?
Love is desperate…
And what if the line works and the guy says ‘man I love you too’… that’s a great day for everyone…lol

Meredith: [to Derek, who is standing behind her] I miss you. [Derek moves closer and sniffs her hair.]
Derek: I can't.

greys, moments, firsts and love

2008-10-03T22:49:00.000-07:00

Meredith: Hey.
Derek: Hey. You almost died today.
Meredith: Yeah, I almost died today. [Derek is at a loss for words and starts heading to the door] I can't, I can't remember our last kiss. All I could think about was I'm going to die today and I can't remember our last kiss. Which, is pathetic but the last time we were together and happy, I... want to be able to remember that, and I can't. I can't remember.
Derek: I'm glad you didn't die today. [Starts to leave but stops] It was a Thursday morning, you were wearing that ratty little 'Dartmouth' T-shirt you look so good in, the one with the hole at the back of the neck. You'd just washed you hair and you smelled like some kind of...flower. I was running late for surgery, you said you were going to see me later, and you lean to me, put you hand on my chest and you kissed me. Soft. It was quick. Kind of like a habit. You know, like we'd do it everyday for the rest of our lives. And you went back to reading the newspaper and I went to work. That was the last time we kissed. [Derek starts to leave]
Meredith: Lavender. My hair smelled like lavender...from my conditioner.
Derek: Lavender. Huh. [Smiles then leaves]

Meredith: Just leave me alone.
Derek: I just want to make sure you're alright.
Meredith: No! I'm not alright? Okay? Are you satisfied? I'm not alright. Because you have a wife, and you call me a whore, and our dog died, and now you're looking at me. Stop looking at me.
Derek: I am not looking at you. I am not looking at you.
Meredith: You are looking at me. And you watch me. And Finn has plans. And I like Finn. He's perfect for me, and I'm really trying here to be happy, and I can't breathe. I can't breathe with you looking at me like that so just stop!
Derek: Do you think I want to look at you? That I wouldn't rather be looking at my wife? I'm married. I have responsibilities. She, she doesn't drive me crazy. She doesn't make it impossible for me to feel normal. She doesn't make me sick to my stomach thinking about my veterinarian touching her with his hands. Man, I would give anything not to be looking at you.

There are certain moments in your life that defines you. Certain moments you wish to remember the rest of your life, even if they were full of pain. The above lines kind of defines so much…it says so much…it is very easy to fall for someone, equally difficult to totally tailor him away from your life… you lie to yourself every day every night cause it doesn’t hurt you, but when the truth dawns on you it is suffocating. You tend not do so many things, you tend to tell every one around you that you are aright. But the truth is you are not alright. You are desperate to be….but you are not…
These moments are stitched to you; they are inseparable from your soul, from your mind. These moments define you. But, what about the painful moments? Moments which bring tear to your eyes, which makes you wish they never had become moments? What about them? How can one escape those memories which you wish to fade but they don’t?
When you are about to die, you would perhaps just remember one of the series of moments, it troubles me which one it would be…happy ones or sad?
Well you would say too early to think all this, but life is unexpected. You don’t know what will happen to you the next second. We aren’t any sage. We are normal beings who require affection and care. We always hope for someone to come in our lives. Someone…so many characteristics to it. He should be tall, fair, smart, an intellect, and a gentleman. But above all this superficial stuff, we crave for warmth, a touch of love. Difficult to have it all actually. Moments with your someone, is always full of memories, some sweet, some romantic some ugly and some so teary…that you wish it never happened.
Writing scrapbook always is fun, and there is always a spot which says define love…love for some is all the filmy stuff. For some it is unsaid and undefined. Then there are some for whom its always about money but for few its an enchanting feeling; feeling like no other. The kind of relationship Meredith and Derek share in the US sitcom Grey’s Anatomy is what love means to me. No matter how far you stretch away, one can never get out of it. Love surely happens n number of times, but there is one soul mate, one true love. Lucky individual happen to spend their life with them few don’t. And it is surely an agonizing time.
So coming back to the original stuff…moments…which ones are precious? Happy ones or sad? With family or with the loved one? Again too early, perhaps you would never really know. The truth would dawn on you when one is just about to say good bye to this world…till then it would be a mystery…
It was very fascinating to me while growing up that why are the first things so special? Like the first time you started to walk (our moms are the only people who could tell us that), the first time you said ‘ma’, first day to school, first crush, date, boyfriend, kiss. Love etc. it’s because we would not know the feeling surrounding it. It’s like an alien surrounding, which one has never entered. And the feeling upon trespassing is like no other. But when it happens the next time you already know how it feels. These firsts also are some precious moments.
What about those days which you wish never arrived, people you wish never came in your life…tricky. Now you can’t change that fact, so the solution is to accept it. But, then it’s difficult to accept it. As difficult to accept that you are wrong. Its nice to realize your wrongs early so that you could fix them up, but most of the time the realisation comes when the destruction has already been done…what a moment it would be to know that now things can never be changed again…
One of my friends got dumped recently and it was not a nice thing see her like that. So all night long she would tell me her ‘moments’ all negative ones she could remember at that time…after a week, she just remembered the nice ones the best ones with him. She said to me ‘although I got dumped but I will never be able to replace the amazing time I spent with him.’ so now she would remember the happier times with him. Good for her, but not every one is like her, we all after a break up tend to criticize the other one. I think that isn’t a great thing to do. What would one get criticizing her ex; I’d treasure all the memories and save it forever. As it defined me. To some it all;
Every day is precious,
Every day has a moment.
Moment’s make a lifetime…
….being in love is a moment
Being away from it also is a moment.
The firsts are moments
The last are as well.
So live life and define it.
Never criticize someone
Because someone would be doing
That to you as well.
And always be welcoming…..
When you meet someone
After years
Someone very dear,It would be a moment of your lifetime

stop staring

2008-10-02T23:38:00.000-07:00

You said that it
Was over,
And now,
You are trying to come closer.
Stop staring,
Stop breathing
Into my life again.

The blame game is over.
And you know
That I won the battle
In front of your mate.
The one who is swinging
Round you.
On this date.

You said that it
Was over,
And now,
You are trying to come closer.
Stop staring,
Stop breathing
Into my life again.

You wanted to run
Like always.
This time I didn’t
Stop you.
Tiered going around a maze.

Happier time with you are
Long over.
They are just so gone.
Be happy with your
Blond mate.
The one who is swinging
Round you.
On this date

You said that it
Was over,
And now,
You are trying to come closer.
Stop staring,
Stop breathing
Into my life again.

monoto.......yuk

2008-10-02T23:30:00.000-07:00

for the past one fortnight i have been into medicines...one stupid thing will get over and the other would crop up.....there is no newspaper in my pg and that is also very irritating...i dont get to know whats going around me......my life presently is so monotonous that it smells stale....im craving to go home, craving to meet new people......the only thing which keeps me going is this internet...without wish i would probably hit myself on the wall

you and me

2008-09-27T00:51:00.000-07:00

What should I do?
Where should I go?
I know, no place
To go.

This cant be true.
We cant be through.
We were so near.

But now times have changed.
Now
Look it has rained.
My hopes
My dreams
My life is so free…

And I am no longer
Me.
It was just a dream…
You and me.
You and me.
You and me.

How can I live
When there is no faith
No faith that it exists.
That
Love exists.

What should I do?
Where should I go?
I know, no place
To go.

This cant be true.
We can’t be through.
We were so near.

But now times have changed.
Now
Look it has rained.
My hopes
My dreams
My life is so free…

And I am no longer
Me.
It was just a dream…
You and me.
You and me.
You and me.

what is...?

2008-09-27T00:48:00.000-07:00

What is life?
Without sacrifice.

What is a kiss?
Without a risk.

What is love? Dear
Without a drop tea

Uncertainty fills our mind
All the time.

Chances we have to take
Even if our heart aches.

i will be fine

2008-09-12T01:06:00.000-07:00

He comes to his beautiful nest with a heavy secret in his heart. He musters all the courage and sits with the women who means the world to him. All his promises to her are coming crashing down. As, his very own existence is in question. He knows he is dieing but he does not know how to tell her. How to tell to the women he loves?
After telling her so, she is broken. She can’t believe what she heard. How could this happen to her, to him. It was just not fair. Time was running away. He comes close to her and embraces her, to give her a false assurance.

I will be fine.
I know that.
It will take time.
I know that.
Till then,
Please be by my side.
As I am afraid to loose your sight.

In the brink,
of breaking up.
I am so shaking up.
To know that there
might be a day.
When I might
Not be there.

I will be fine.
I know that.
It will take time.
I know that.
Till then,
Please be by my side.
As I am afraid to loose you sight.

(There I go.
Do you know?
I am leaving you forever and ever.
To comeback; never and never)

I am afraid to loose your sight
So
Please be by my side.
I will be fine.
I know that it will take time.
I know that.
Till then,
Please be by my side.
As I am afraid to loose you sight.To loose you sight………….

holding your hand

2008-08-27T00:50:00.000-07:00

Holding your hand.
I crossed all the tides.
Do you remember all those
Rides.
As I do.
Holding your hand.

My worries will be gone.
My smile is all that shone.
Holding your hand.

I was behind you.
My friend
My angle.
My hope
And my dreams.
Holding your hand.
Holding your hand.

You lost the grip.
And then I tripped.
I am lost. I cannot find you.

Tears are swimming in.
Please come so that they could
Remain in.
Come back
Please
Come back…

You held back my hands,
Held it as strong
As you never had.
I was now not
Walking behind you.

I was taking my chance.
I am going to be strong.
Without holding your hand.

I will cross the tide.
Cause I know…
You will be right by my side
Holding my hand
Holding my hand

Seven steps

2008-07-29T08:37:00.000-07:00

Seven steps.
It’s just seven steps.
We can do it.
‘cause its just
seven steps.

Seven years of separation.
And years of temptations.
We finally are here,
But why this fear?
Its just seven steps,
Between us.
Seven steps
To burry the past.
Seven steps.
Lets do it fast.

Why do you look tensed.
Even when there is no fence.
No boundation,
No obligations.
‘cause we are done
listening to the world.

‘cause its been seven years,
since we last met, my dear.
Our lives have changed
Many people have failed.
But
Here you are
And there I am .

Seven steps.
Its just seven steps.
We can do it.
‘cause its seven steps.

Now the space is gone
Its just you and me.
The shackles are gone,
Its just you and me.

Oh it was so easy
Those
Seven steps are gone.
We did it

a fairy tale

2008-07-27T12:05:00.000-07:00

i wish i could fly,

without saying any good byes.

i wish i could love,

without being snubbed.

i wish i could be a princess,

and where all lovely dresses.

i wish i could be in a fairy tale.

where ,

a happy ending does'nt look frail.

i wish sometimes to be a movie star,

and throw my worries of the cart.

i wish to go to the moon.

and laugh at all the earthly fools.

i wish sometimes to be me.

which i have lost in some kind of hurry.

i wish i could be in a fairy tale.
where,
happy endings does'nt look frail.

MEN ARE DOGS

2008-07-27T11:04:00.000-07:00

being a girl is not easy...trust me when i say this. earlier i never had to face the 'boy problem'. as i was either out wid my family or for that matters my best frnd in front of whoem no one could even sureley stare. but when i landed in this moronic unknown city, i had to learn one more trick to survive in this world. patience.

in these two years i learnt zillions of things about guys.

1) never get friendly with a guy from the word go. 'cause they will think that ladki phassi

2) never receive a guy's call late night. cause surely a bet would be involved.

3) there are 2 types of stares. one is like- oh ure so preety. and the second one is the most disgusting one as if there is something wrong wid ure wordrobe.

4) never ever take a pass of a guy lightly. if you dont stop it now it would increase a lot.

one of the most astonishing fact that a guy thinks is that they can easily get off by flirting with a girl. and that acts as an advantage actually. innitially i had to live with it as i thought and some girl frnds of mine advised me that i should not take any panga's. but i think there is a limit to every thing.

so now if a guy paases a comment i turn right back and stare the hell out of them. its apleasure to see them that wayz actually.

and if a certain decorum is crossed.... then something like this would happen

i was walking down the street at around 7:30 wid my hostle mate when a guy who happened to be from my institiute whistled. i turned right back but my friend told me to ignore and so i did. and as soon as i turned i heared a very disgusting remark made on me.

all hell broke loose. i charged to him, grabbed his colour and told him to appologise before i called up the director. there was a silence in the entire street as if a nuclear explosion has happened. he applogised though and said it wont happen again.......

some might say i acted dumb or may be that i was courageous enough to do it. but i felt gr8.....being a girl is not a crime but i feel one has to take a stand . not every time my dad or buddy will be there to take care of me.

just three weeks back i was taking part in a seminar. and my picture was takin by an unknown lad. i walked up to him and demanded for hiss cell phone to which he refused. i was like- ok you invited the trouble. after the seminar got over and while he was smirking as if he has done something great i told him to give his cell phone or i would call in the organisers. he thought i was just lieing. but then some seniors of mine came out to help me. there 2 pictures clicked and each of which was deleted. i was so happy.....well men are dogs but they are different in breeds....some are street some are poodles and some the great den.......

at the end of it all i would say.........its stupid to be quite so get up and take a stand....its the 21st century for christ sake.....

2008-07-25T10:11:00.000-07:00

Love is a many splendid thing. Love lifts us up where we belong. All you need is love! ~ from the movie Moulin Rouge ~

Other men said they have seen angels, But I have seen thee And thou art enough. ~ by G. Moore ~

I would fly you to the moon and back if you'll be . . . if you'll be my baby. ~ From a song by Savage Garden ~

I love you - those three words have my life in them. ~ by Alexandrea to Nicholas III ~

What lies behind us, and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us. ~ by Ralph Waldo Emerson ~

I have been astonished that men could die martyrs for their religion - I have shudder'd at it. I shudder no more. I could be martyr'd for my religion Love is my religion And I could die for that. I could die for you. ~ by John Keats ~

I'd like to run away From you, But if you didn't come And find me ... I would die. ~ by Shirley Bassey ~

When you love someone, all your saved-up wishes start coming out. ~ by Elizabeth Bowen (1899-1973) ~

The greatest thing you'll ever learn Is to love and be loved in return. ~ From "Unforgettable with Love" by Natalie Cole

the lady in black

2008-07-25T06:43:00.000-07:00

i am done.

i am done,crying for you.

i am done.

i am done, begging to you

now its time,

time for the old me.

its time for the lady in black,

to, comeback.

people were wishing for it too.

so now, the lady is back.

wearing a red dress.

and a trendy high heel.

i went to a discotheque.

to reinvent me.....

every eyes were on me.

as the lady is back.

the lady in black is back.

people were wishing for it too.

so now the lady is back.

now a sip of vodka, which goes down in my throat.

i see you with a blond.

and my heart takes a dip.

but i am done, sweety.

done crying for you.

and i come towards you, to say.

the lady in black is back,

people were wishing for it too.

so the lady is back

oh. she is back.

there's a new lad in the hell.
he tries to offer me a drink
i look at you and smile...

'but now...everything is gone,
why cant i see you in a torn.
it does'nt matter to you .does it?
i loved you soo much.
did you ever get it?'

but i am done,

crying for you.

i am done, waiting for you.

its time for the old me.

so i grab the lad's hand

and then.

every body screams...

the lady in black is back...

we were wishing for it too.

so the lady is back..

yes...she is back.

to rule our heart...

the blue dress

2008-07-25T06:22:00.000-07:00

wearing a blue dress,
i waited in the street.
for you to come and take me away.
now the dark clouds have set in.
my mascara is running out.
i have been waiting since the dawn.
the stars are coming new.
but where are you?
now, the lilies ask me.
where is my prince,
that shrewd friend of mine
is giving me a wink.
but i know you'll come
'cause you told me you'll come.
you promised i was your Cinderella,
and you will be my umbrella.

i am all drenched,
but my hopes are ignited still,
whatever the world says,
I'll come again.
again, at the break of dawn.
like I've been coming since long.
wearing the same old
blue dress you gave me.
I'll come again,
again and again, every dawn.

my knight in shining armour

2008-07-25T02:21:00.000-07:00

it was a beautiful night.
it was soo bright.
i had never been so awestruck
by a magnificent structure.
and there he was at a distance
my knight in shining armour.

all through the darkness,
i was playing with my eyes.
trying to avoid his
two pair of concavity.

oh, how i wished he could hold me.
oh, i wish he could just look at me.
after all he was a dream,
he was my knight in shining armour.

in a span of one, two, three,
he was coming closer to me.
my life had never been so adventurous,
what was cute, was that he was so
flirtatious.

all through the darkness,
i was playing with my eyes'
trying to avoid his two pair
of concavity.

months went by,
many moons had gone by.
i had a fantasy, within me.
he had captured my
imagination.
after all he was my knight,
in shinning armour.

he was perfect.
i mean, he still is.
but, happiness is short lived.
i always knew he had to drift.
he was going away to be with someone,
my eyes had moistened,
as i was not the one.

all through the darkness
i was playing with my eyes.
trying to avoid his two pair
of concavity.

he is gone, but he still lives.
he is a friend, even if i am stiffed.
its important to be happy,
as he once said like a four year old baby.

life makes you meet, wonderful people,
never let them go.
its a bad world,
where you dont find friends.
every now and then.
even if,
(i accepted)
he was not my knight in shinning armour...

you left me...?

2008-07-24T21:40:00.000-07:00

why should I cry,
why should I wait,
why should I f eel so lonely.
just because you left me?

I will not remain lonely.
I will party every time.
I'll smile wider every time.
why should i think of you?
because you left me?

I can carry on,
without you.
I can love the spring,
without you.
I can live without you.
but why did you leave me?

Its been a while now,
the seasons have changed twice.
I have someone else
to love me.
but i still don't know,
why...?
why am I still waiting for you?
why am I still in love with you?
why did you leave me?
just because you had to leave me?

jonasmania

2008-07-24T12:23:00.000-07:00

this entry is because my sis is jonafied......
few months back i got a frantic call from her. and the only word i coud listen was 'jonas brothers'. i had absolutely no idea what she was talking about..in a week i got to know as i was locked up wid my computer and made to hear all their songs and youtube video. i got very irritated and left the room.
later that night i creep ed out to my lappy and heard the songs......i had been jonafied as well.....
i dont know why so many girls have become crazy about this rock band.....is it their personality or their songs.....i dont know...
but the fact that they have become a hysteria round the globe speaks volume of their success.
if you still dont know what i am talking about then fellas go and start surfin the net for their songs......cause they are so refreshing and young...hear especially 'when you look me in the eyes' (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-ZBoPlCzuRY)and 'please be mine'.....
the band comprises of joe nick and kevin jonas. all brothers, but it is joe who is the eye candy to my sis..........
being very critical about music, the jonas brothers have been like a welcome change actually......since all my other favourite rock bands are getting old.....i hate to admit it
check out r=their latest hit single burning up and trust me you'll bless me http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0z1kSdk7y1A

and i hope truly hope sis that one day you'll see their concert..

they are a rage and are here to stay for a looong time

why cant we care?

2008-07-24T11:38:00.000-07:00

last tuesday was a historic day for indian politics. well the trust vote happened and congress won. of course they were many filmy twists like MP's taking out cash and declaring they were traded, or lalu yadav singing hindi film songs( that was so irritating...go to indian idol instead) and the cherry on the cake was rahul gandhi who after appraising mr. vajpai demanded that the BJP leaders should clap.........(how sarcastic one can get)
at the end mr singh was happy that his madam S was smiling all the way.......
but the bottom line is .......how many watched the whole drama or went ahead to see kismat konnection...
i was told by my mates that if i dare switch on the television and put on the news i will be slaughtered.......
my agaony was no bound for the simple fact.....why cant they care wts going on in the country..
saifu and bebu had a fight...so what will it impact the world?
or that some stupid reality show is coming where there is high pitched drama.....?
are we the 'youngistan' are shallow minded........?
well on pondering deeply for two days i have concluded that people give importance to those things which matters to them...like IPL, euro cup and the Tuesday saga was important to me, it mattered my digestion
in the same manner it was important to see what exactly happened at katrina's birthday party?
but still.......it should be pondered.....do we really care what is going on in our country even if it does not affect our lives......

lets tell the world

2008-07-24T11:00:00.000-07:00

i always knew there was some one for me...
like i always knew that the sun smiles to me
i was waiting for you in the cloudy misty
rainy days of my life
and you came in my paradise
and you will remained with me
till eternity...ties...

c'mon...lets tell the world
lets tell from the rooftop
that we are together
now forever.....forever.....and ever and ever

in the green flushes of the city
with all kinds of beautiful lilies
we would stay
as the rain would pour down
i'll take you in my arms
i wont care what the other lasses might think
i wont look at granies
i'll just look at you
i'll just look into you
you know why
because i want to tell the world
lets tell from the rooftop
that we are together
now forever.....

i am crazy for you from the day i saw you
i waited till you could be with me
i dreamt day and night of you
and now here we are in this rude world
which never understood my love for you
thats why i say

c'mon...lets tell the world
lets tell from the rooftop
that we are together
now forever.....forever.....and ever and ever
from the rooftop
we are together
not just for now but forever and ever and ever and ever

for you

2008-07-24T10:39:00.000-07:00

there you go...in the crowd...of strangers
there you go...wiping ure tears
dont go....my darling
dont.....leave me....leave me all alone..
i am waiting for you in my arms.
for you

remember the sunshine who woke us up together
or the flowers who were standing still
your eyes were smiling but you didnt say a word
i was waiting to hear that you were mine
now forever
dont go my darling dont leave me
,,,leave me all alone.
i am waiting for you in my arms.
for you

love ...u till eternity
i'll wait for you till you come back to me
when you will realize
that we were ment to be together
i would be gone
you would be near so turn back............

there you go in the crowd...of strangers
there you go...wiping ure tears...
on the street dont go....my darling
dont.....leave me....leave me all alone..
i am waiting for you in my arms.
for you come back i know
you want to
i'll be waiting for u till i die
i am waiting for u in my arms
for u